Just Missed the Train
by Akirou
Summary: It was together that they proved to the whole world that peace could be truly achieved between the two races, despite their differences and flaws. They were all simply human, which they both made clear. COMPLETE!
1. Just Missed the Train

**Disclaimer** – I don't own Gundam Seed, it's characters, and main plotline. Get off my back. Heck, if I did, GSD would never have happened, at least the way it is now. Praise Fukuda for it's all time crappiness.

Hey steshin – Hope this is something for ya. Meh, not quite that lemon you were looking for, but hey, wait mm'k?

**Just Missed the Train**

_Roll over, baby. The time has come_

While struggling to dodge the other on goers, she was doing her best to keep her groceries inside the bag they stayed in. A lot had changed for her after the second war, everything became so…_different_. So, how different was _different_?

_To make a little bit more room_

Well, while she was still stuck inside the office, Kira and Lacus had gotten married and just recently Lacus had given birth to two baby boys. Miriallia and Dearka had solved their past issues and decided to give themselves one more chance, and together, they were making the best of it in ORB. Even Yzak was living a happy life with his fiancée, fellow ZAFTy, Shiho.

_I've hung around you_

Everyone was just so happy in the world, and nothing could take that away since they were all happy with the ones they loved. She was more than ecstatic find her friends in relationships, she was proud to be the aunt of two wonderful little boys, and was proud to be friends with three of ZAFTs finest, and she was pleased with the fact she was best friends with ORB's best photographer and PLANT's greatest pop icon. But most of all, she was especially proud of the peace she had achieved with every single one of them.

_It's getting tough_

She was happy…but, was she _really_? Kira had been worried with her lack of sleep and her overworking, coming home early in the morning just for a cup of coffee and immediately rushing back to work. Lacus had figured she had not wanted to stay home, forced to linger on past events. Miriallia and the others often asked her what events were they. Lacus usually left before giving them a straight answer. But, to any close friend of Cagalli's, it was pretty obvious what she was trying to escape from. Or in this case, _whom_.

_I think I'm gonna break down soon_

So, what exactly was she trying to escape from? The past that she knew, the past that was Athrun Zala. What ever happened to them? Well, during the war, he had made it very clear to her that his top priority was to protect the life of Lacus impersonator, Mia Campbell. Cagalli never questioned him why he _had_ to protect such a worthless life, but she wasn't one to stop him from doing what he wanted to do. And she wasn't about to start now. She insisted that they end their so-called relationship, so they could worry less on them and clearly set and accomplish their goals. It wasn't easy for her, or for him, but she knew, and she had a feeling he did, too, that it was best for them to be apart.

_I remember _

She didn't want to, she didn't have to, but she did anyway. Tapping her foot impatiently on the floor, her groceries locked in her arms, she began to frown at the thought of him, at the thought of that train. "Stupid train. I'm gonna be late for that stupid meeting…"

_Crying in the park, it was getting dark_

Whilst waiting hastily, she leaned over to the pillar beside her and dropped off her grocery bags to lean on. Sighing, she picked herself up and her eyes caught sight of a pair of intense emerald ones.

_Suddenly, I looked up_

"Cagalli…"

"Athrun…"

For a moment, the two seemed to have just gotten lost in each other's eyes, became caught up in the trance. Athrun blinked first and casually walked over to her. "So, um, how are you, Cagalli?"

"Fine, thank you. How are things with you and Mia?"

At this Athrun flinched inside, but brushed it off, quickly stuffing his sweaty palms inside his pockets. "I really wouldn't know. Haven't seen her since the war."

"Really? Wow…well, take care of yourself, Athrun."

"Yeah…you, too," he said emotionlessly as possible. With his hands still in his pockets, he started to make his way home, on the verge of losing himself in the crowd. He turned his head to his side, just to steal one last look before he walked away forever.

_You were my sky_

Squinting, she could make out from afar the train that she was eager to get on. Smiling, she bent down to pick up her grocery bags, resting on the pillar. Just then, she felt a pair of eyes watching her. Looking up, she found the same pair.

_So go on_

Before she could say anything, a strong grip on her wrist pushed her up, urging her to follow. "ATHRUN!" she screamed, her yell echoing through the corridors of the station, her groceries dropping to the floor, the contents inside now scattered about around the floor.

"Athrun! Where are you taking me!"

_And sleep darling_

He didn't respond. Instead, he kept on running, her hand held enclosed in his.

_Why don't you pretend we were just a dream?_

Finally, he stopped, releasing his tight hold on her hand. He kept his back facing her, not one word escaped through his rough breath.

"Athrun?"

_It's cool baby_

He turned around on his heels to face her, an angry expression on his face. "Why!"

Cagalli blinked, as she could do nothing else, trying her hardest to understand what he meant.

"Why did we have to end up like this? Why did…why did you and I have to break up so soon? We had a future, Cagalli! A future! Why…why couldn't you see that?"

_It doesn't matter anyway_

Cagalli sighed, reaching her hand towards his, and wrapping her fingers with his own. "There was nothing we could do then, Athrun. We were two enemies, fighting a war. What were we supposed to do?"

_I'm so sorry_

His expression saddened, as he turned to face his shoes, avoiding her gaze. He couldn't understand, he didn't want to. His hands quivered at the thought.

_We got to the station a little too late_

Cagalli let off a gentle smile. "We couldn't prevent any of this from happening, Athrun. No matter how hard we fought, it was just inevitable. And all I have to say is get over it."

_It's such a shame, we just missed the train._

He looked up at her stern reaction, which eventually softened up to a warm smile.

_Be quite, angel_

"So," Cagalli sighed, "we're here now, at the beach. What exactly did you want to do here, Athrun?"

_Don't make a sound_

"Let's talk, you know, catch up on lost times. I mean, it's been a while since we last had an appropriate conversation."

_Save it for a rainy day_

Suddenly, he felt a cool sensation roll down his face. Water. He felt some more. "Cagalli? What are you…?"

She had taken off her shoes and jumped into the water, splashing some on his face, just to lighten up the mood a bit.

_Oh can't you see me?_

"Ugh…Hey! Cagalli! Stop it!" he yelled, wiping his face after every single splash.

The blonde just laughed as she put the splashing to a hold, allowing the poor boy to dry up at least.

He looked at her smile. Not one thing had changed about her, even after all that time. She was still the same girl he had fallen in love with those four years ago.

_I'm such a mess_

Sighing, he jumped in the water along with her. "Cagalli….I've missed you."

_Trying hard to find my way_

He extended a hand forward, reaching for the back of her neck, his fingers playing with her hair. Out of nowhere, he just decided to hug her. It felt good to hold her again.

_Do you remember_

With her hands pinned down to her sides and his arms surrounding her like the good old days, her eyes widened, shocked by his sudden reaction. No doubt, she missed him, too.

_Wasting all that time_

"Four years", she thought sadly, warming up to his embrace, his scent mixed with the salt water she had splashed on him earlier still filling her nostrils.

_We were feeling fine_

She pulled away from him, no matter how good she felt being in his arms again. She held his hand in hers, her amber eyes meeting his emerald ones.

_Though we couldn't walk a line_

_We were alright_

"What ever happened to us, Cagalli?" Athrun asked, breaking the silence between them. He noticed her shivering a bit as he waited her response. Taking off his thin jacket, he placed it around her shoulders for a little bit comfort from the cold breeze around them.

"Thank you." She held on to the collar with one hand, the other holding his hand.

_So go on and sleep darling_

"I really don't know what happened, Athrun. It all happened so fast. I mean…we just never found the time to, well, be a couple. I never found that thing every little girl dreams about…not in you…not in that time."

_Why don't you pretend we were just a dream?_

He looked on sadly, watching the ocean breeze play with her damp blonde locks. He never knew that her reactions would hurt _this_ much.

"I don't know. We just…well, we just _lost_ it, I guess. I mean, we both gave up on us, Athrun. When I agreed to marry Yuuna, I gave up. When you…" she bit her lip, hesitating. She turned her head sadly to the side, to face the sparkling ocean waves crash onto shore.

_It's cool, baby_

"When you chose to protect Mia over…over me, you gave up."

_It doesn't matter anyway._

Athrun turned his head in the opposite direction. The truth hurt…didn't it?

_I'm so sorry_

"But, Athrun…"

He looked up.

"We _can_ start over."

_We got to the station a little too late._

His eyes widened then softened up. "Are you sure? I mean, we're both quitters. Kind of hard to believe that the Princess of Orb was a quitter herself. Now, that's not the Cagalli I knew back then."

_It's such a shame_

This made her laugh. Not just any laugh. It wasn't those laughs she laughed just because. No. This was one of those Athrun laughs. The kind that she could only laugh when Athrun was around.

_We just missed the train._

She held his hand tightly. "Athrun…I miss having you around…" She slowly drew his hand up to her face. It was so warm. Her breathing calmed as he caressed her cheek, her eyes closing as she felt his touch.

_Oh, why'd that train just pass us by?_

She slowly opened her eyes as she felt his hands slide away. Staring into his deep emerald orbs, she reached her hand out to brush a strand of hair away from his face.

_Didn't anyone see_

Following her initial reaction, he closed his eyes as he felt her hand caress his face, crawling up through his scalp, her hand running through his hair, then running back down following that same path.

_We were stuck at the light_

He was so beautiful.

_Or we would've made it on time._

She felt a hand push her back towards him. Her one hand still holding on to his jacket tightly, the other moving quickly to his chest.

She closed her eyes, and their lips finally met. "_After four years…you still feel the same way…"_she thought, pressing herselfhard against him, deepening their kiss.

_So sleep darling_

She opened her eyes abruptly when she just realized what she was doing. Pulling away unwillingly, she gazed sadly into his eyes then turned around quickly to get away. She felt his hand grip her wrist tightly.

He turned her around on her heels and in one fluid motion; she flew back to him, her face cupped in his hands, their foreheads resting on each others. "Don't go…not yet."

She felt his hot breath on her lips and under regular circumstances, she immediately heated up into a blush. "Athrun…"

His eyes were slowly closing as his lips came ever so close to hers. "Like you said…we can start over." And at that, he pulled her in for another kiss. Not that "Hey, I think I like you" kind of kiss. Nope. It was just one of those kisses you'd never want to get out of.

_Why don't you pretend we were just a dream?_

Athrun walked over to the railing where she had tied his jacket on. Slowly untying the piece of cloth, a tear fell from his eye. Then another one. And another. He held the jacket close to him. "Why…?"

_It's cool baby_

"Kira…pick me up."

"Where are you, Cagalli?"

"Café downtown….the one closest to the beach."

"Cool. I'll be there in a few."

_Click_

_It doesn't matter anyway_

She had just ran away, ran away from everything she held dear to her.

**FLASHBACK**

She broke away from the kiss, for the second time, for good. "I'm sorry, Athrun…not today…not ever. I said we could start over…but, I don't want to…I can't."

She tied his jacket to a railing nearby and left him confused and most likely heartbroken by the beach. Not once did she turn around to even catch a glimpse. She didn't need to. She knew what he'd do. Cry. And so would she.

**END FLASHBACK**

_It doesn't matter anyway_

_honk honk_

Cagalli looked up to find her brother in his flashy convertible. "Hey Cagalli. Hop in."

She did, not even returning his welcome. He started driving stealing a peek at the corner of his eye to look at his sister's uncharacteristic silence.

_I'm so sorry_

"Is everything alright?"

Cagalli leaned her chin on her hand resting on the car side.

"Yeah."

"You sure? You seem kind of…quiet."

_We got to the station a little too late._

"Really, Kira, I'm fine."

Kira turned his sites on the road, fixed on getting home ASAP. Something wasn't right with her; he knew it, but he knew better than to ask.

_It's such a shame_

She looked down at her finger. Yup, it was still there. That same damned ring. "Stupid ring…stupid Athrun…" she thought silently, the wind blowing away the tears in her eyes. She looked to her side to find the train that she was supposed to be on.

The train.

The beach.

It was the only thing separating her from the place where she left it all behind. It was the only thing separating her from the one she loved.

_We just missed the train_

So? Whatcha think? Please review. If you liked, I might make a sequel or turn this one into a chapter fic. SO…WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR! REVIEW!


	2. Behind These Hazel Eyes

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, and main plotline. I do, however, own this story, so sit back and relax, and don't call the cops on me.

I also don't own the song "Behind These Hazel Eyes". They belong to Kelly Clarkson and her people.

Hlin – much love for the review. A doujin story on another site? Gah, I never go anywhere to really find that stuff out. So, I guess if what you say is true, then this story is dedicated and inspired by whoever originally wrote it.

Asga – GREAT TO SEE YOU AGAIN! glomps Thank for the review!

Attharun – thanks for the review! And I'm sure you could write em, just don't be lazy! xD, but I'm lazy too, so who am I to say anything?

**Chapter 2 – Behind These Hazel Eyes**

_Seems just like yesterday_

The ocean breeze played with her hair as they continued to drive back home. Once again, she stared out into the beach, the sparkling water glittering in her eyes.

_You were a part of me_

She could've sworn she saw him there, still crying. Probably just a bunch of seagulls.

_I used to stand so tall_

Leaning in on her chair, she began to relax as best as a girl who just dumped a guy could. Wrapping her arms around herself, she took one last glimpse of the ring on her finger. Sighing, she allowed her weariness to take control as she fell into deep slumber.

_I used to be so strong_

"I'm so lucky to have met you."

_Your arms around me tight_

He had just pulled her into one of his out of the blue hugs and in his embrace, she was blushing like a lobster, once more placed into a position she didn't know how to act or get out of.

_Everything it felt so right_

He pulled away slowly, taking time to stare into her gorgeous hazel eyes.

_Unbreakable like nothing could go wrong_

"We can protect each other." And with that, she slowly closed her eyes as he let him pull her in for a soft and longing kiss.

_Now I can't breathe_

She shivered in her dreams and this did not go unnoticed by her brother who had just stopped downtown for some gas.

_No I can't sleep_

"It's the weirdest thing, Lacus. She's so quiet and so out of it. Do you think she saw him again?" Kira took the pump out of the car and back into its socket.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. But, I just have this feeling something happened while I was away."

_I'm barely hanging on_

He pulled her outside with him, took her left hand, and immediately placed a ring on her fourth finger.

_Here I am /Once again/ I'm torn into pieces_

"Isn't there a better way to give me a ring that this?"

_Can't deny it/ Can't pretend/ Just thought you were the one_

He blushed and turned to face his side. "Well, sorry."

_Broken up deep inside/ But you won't get to see the tears I cry_

She giggled softly and he looked at her.

_Behind these hazel eyes_

They shared yet another kiss, and this time, she was ready for it.

_I told you everything_

"Keep in touch," she said as she watched him walk away from her.

_Opened up and let you in_

He pounced her, his knife glaring the sun's rays at her face. With momentary shock, he loosened his hold on the "soldier".

_You made me feel alright for once in my life_

"A girl?"

Now, if he weren't so strong and holding her in this position pinned to the ground, she would've kicked him in the crotch or something. But this wasn't the first time he'd hold her like he did.

_Now all that's left of me_

She sat in confinement at the Seiran house, unable to do much else as the moment of truth came ever so close.

_Is what I pretend to be_

A rush of memories came back to her, a storybook of love coming back to her. All inside her head was _him_.

She bent down trying her hardest to fight it. But a knock on her door sent her back up.

It was time.

_So together but so broken up inside_

"You haven't said a word so far. Are you nervous?"

She turned to face her husband to be. "I'm fine."

Yuuna poured himself a drink, "Then do yourself a favor and smile."

_Cause I can't breathe_

She began to wave to her people as they continued on with the ceremony. Slowly but surely, tears fell down her face, threatening to ruin her make up. But as of now, that was the least of her worries.

_No I can't sleep_

"Those better be tears of joy," he warned her as he assisted her off the limo.

_I'm barely hanging on/ Here I am_

As they continued up the steps, she was begging deep inside that someone would save her; the _he _would save her.

_Once again/ I'm torn into pieces_

She spaced out as the priest's words came in one ear and immediately out the other.

_Can't deny it/ Can't pretend_

People began to panic behind her. Turning around, she felt Yuuna quivering behind her as she found Freedom stand before her.

The gundam picked her up and flew away into the wild blue, distinctly hearing Yuuna's voice crying out to disable that gundam.

_Just thought you were the one_

"Why are you still here? Go back to ORB!"

Cagalli fell back in shock. This was not the same Athrun she knew back then. He was different, in all sense of the word.

_Broken up deep inside_

She lay on her bed, staring at the ring on her finger. Sighing, she stuffed the pillow in her face and wondered, "What ever happened to us?"

_But you won't get to see the tears I cry/ Behind these hazel eyes_

_Swallow me then spit me out_

"Athrun…"

"Cagalli…"

_For hating you I blame myself_

"Why are you…with her, Athrun?" she choked as she could do nothing more watching the imposter hold on to him like it meant the world. And he went along with it.

_Just seeing you it kills me now_

It hurt more than any bullet, knife, anything. It just hurt.

"Cagalli…please understand. I have to protect her. There are people out there…who…who want her dead. I won't just sit back and watch them take an innocent life away, Cagalli, it's not fair."

"_I have to protect her." _He had said something similar way back when. It hurt that he just threw it away.

"I see…well, I guess it's fine with me. Even if she did have no shame in taking the identity of one of your friends, Athrun, I guess it's alright. You've made your point…"

Athrun was taken back with shock. Trying to wriggle free from the girl attached to him, he tried his best to follow her as she walked away.

_No I don't cry_

He reached her and put a strong grip on her shoulder and forced her around to face him. "Cagalli! Listen to me!"

"I did listen, Athrun! Now it's your turn!" Her eyes were tearing and her voice was shaking, and he gritted her teeth as his grip on her tightened. She couldn't bring herself to look at him. She just couldn't.

_On the outside_

"I promised myself a long time ago I wouldn't cry. I promised myself that the next time I'd see you, I wouldn't cry. Well, this was the next time, and I won't cry. I won't, you understand me!"

_Anymore_

He loosened his grip as he stepped back from her. His eyes wide with shock, he opened his mouth to respond, but nothing but air came out. "Do what you want, Athrun, I don't care anymore! I want this war to end, once and for all! And I will do it with or without your help, it just doesn't matter anymore!"

She brushed his hand aside and began walking in the opposite direction. Mia just walked up to Athrun and locked his arm with hers.

Cagalli didn't look back, she didn't need to, nor did she even want to. But, she did manage one thing before she left him. "It's over, Athrun."

_Here I am_

That was the last time she ever saw him. Or at least, that's what she thought. She never planned to see him again, despite the many times he was on her mind.

_Once again_

"_Athrun…_"

She felt someone shaking her shoulder. Her eyes flickered open to a blurry Kira.

_I'm torn into pieces_

He smiled and prodded her up, "We're home, Cagalli."

_Can't deny it/ Can't pretend_

He helped her out of the car. Still a little dazed, she walked to her home on unsteady legs.

_Just thought you were the one_

"So, sweet dreams?"

She looked at her brother and smiled warmly. "I guess."

"What happened back there?"

_Broken up deep inside_

"Nothing important."

_But you won't get to see the tears I cry_

"Alright. Well, I see no groceries. So I guess eat out for tonight? Is that alright with you?"

"Yeah, that's fine…Is Kai home?"

"Yeah, he is. He's been waiting for you, you know. Kind of got worried while you were away."

Cagalli opened the door to her home and found Kai seated on the steps of her stairs. "Cagalli! You're back!" He stepped up towards her, his penetrating blue eyes gazing at her petite figure as it made its way inside. "I've missed you."

He hugged her and in his embrace, all she could see, feel, and smell, was Athrun.

_Behind these hazel eyes_

I'm so cruel to Cagalli and Athrun. Gah, I love them to bits…actually, more so Cagalli, since I can actually relate with her. I LOVE YOU CAGALLI…and ASUCAGA!

I decided to make this a chapter fic. And an explanation for the songs. Both by Kelly Clarkson if you pointed that out, you get candy! Hooray for you! Meh, I wasn't going to turn chapter 2 into a song fic sorta thing, but I couldn't help it. I heard this song 12 times yesterday! It was on like every radio station! It's a pretty cool song, and this coming from a girl who listens to Nirvana. xD. But yeah, listen to it some time, and watch the video too. A great inspiration for me. BTW, Kelly Clarkson in this video wore an outfit that had just reminded me of Mia's outfit. I LOL-ed when I saw it. You gotta check it out

Anywho, please review.

And much love to JC- Titans143 for allowing me to use her character KAI! Please read her story to understand who Kai is. And AsuCaga fans, please don't kill me.


	3. Everytime

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Seed, sadly, or its characters or main plotline. I do, however, own this story, and JC-Titans143 owns the character Kai. Don't call the cops on me, or I will be forced to kill you.

I also don't own the song "Everytime". Also, if you thought I was gonna use the song by Britney Spears, don't speak to me. Personally, I hate her, but that's just one person's opinion. It's owned by Simple Plan and their people.

Much love for the reviews, people. I love you all….even if you don't want to love me back right about now. My creative juices are flowing like crazy! Maybe its cuz skewl's almost out…well, whatever it is, it better keep working!

**Chapter 3 – Everytime**

_It was 3 AM when you woke me up_

"Great, Zala, just great. Aegis is useless and you're stuck on an island in the middle of nowhere. How great," he thought grimly has he viewed his tropical surroundings. Nothing more than sand, stones, and trees.

_And we jumped in the car and drove as far as we could go_

"Well, it's useless staying here. I guess it wouldn't hurt to check out the place," he thought as he started walking towards the small forest that seemed to be smack dab in the middle.

_Just to get away_

Noticing another presence with him on the island as he emerged from the forested area, he had his gun at hand, ready to kill at will.

She shot.

He shot.

And before either of them knew it, he was on top of her with his knife ready to kill. He blinked his eyes a couple of times and his grip on the person's vest loosened feeling that their chest area was unusually…_different _from that of a man's.

"A girl?"

_We talked about our lives  
_

"Let me see the damn wound!" she pressed on, insisting that she tend to his wound, however mild it may have been.

"Fine! Can you at least put some clothes on?"

She complied, as she didn't want to be anymore in his debt as she was already. Afterwards, he opened up the chest of his flight suit and she dressed his wounds with ease. All the while, he stared at the girl. "_Who is she?"_

_Until the sun came up_

"Cagalli!"

He turned around to face the girl he was parting from.

"That's my name! Cagalli! What's yours?"

"Athrun!"

She smiled. "Don't get yourself killed, Athrun!" She turned around and ran towards Strike, unknowing that she was leaving the person that in the future would mean more than anything.

_And now I'm thinking about_

Athrun hung his head down low as he stood at the front of a window in his apartment, watching as the sun set below him, and the night lights of ORB began to glow.

_How I wish I could go back_

"_I'm sorry, Athrun…not today…not ever. I said we could start over…but, I don't want to…I can't."_

He sighed. "Why _can't_ you?"

_Just for one more day_

A knock on his door awakened him from his deep thought. Walking over, he opened the door to find Yzak, Shiho, Dearka, and Miriallia…all looking very happy. "Hey."

"Evenin' Zala! Good to see you're still alive!" Dearka greeted happily, patting Athrun hard on the back.

"Dearka! Good to see you, too! What brings you guys over here?" He held back as many grunts as possible; Dearka had a mean "pat".

_One more day with you_

"Well, Kira called us up. Said something about eating out for dinner tonight. He invited us, and well, since we had nothing better to do, we accepted. Thought you'd like to come," Yzak explained, prying Dearka away from the wheezing Athrun.

"So, hows about it, Zala? Wanna come?" Dearka teased, going back to his place beside Miriallia. "It'd be great! Just like ZAFT all over again, hey old pal?"

_Every time I see your face_

ZAFT. The main reason why she hated him so. ZAFT brought him back to war. ZAFT **made** him protect Mia Campbell. ZAFT **made** him see how much she suffered. ZAFT **showed** him how much she hated him.

_Every time you look my way_

"Who else is coming?" he asked sheepishly, wondering if a certain someone would be there, too.

_It's like it all falls into place_

"Lacus, probably. And, well, I can't think of who else might come. I mean, it's been like what, four years since I last heard from them?" Yzak stated very impatiently. "Can we hurry up and go? I'm starving like hell over here, Zala!"

_And everything feels right_

Shiho nudged her fiancé swiftly on his stomach. "Stop being rude, Yzak."

"Shut up, woman! I was just trying to be nice!"

"You call that nice?"

_Ever since you walked away _

Athrun watched as the "couple" went back and forth bickering until the argument made absolutely no sense.

And yet, he _envied_ them.

_You left my life in disarray _

At least they had a relationship, even if they didn't show it well. It reminded him so much of his relationship with Cagalli. How they just fought about the little things for hours and hours at a time. But, it just became different when she left.

_All I want is one more day_

"HEY!"

The two ended their childish bickering in a snap and all four turned to face Athrun.

_All I need is one more day with you_

He reached for his jacket lying on the couch beside him. "I'm going, if that's alright with you."

Miriallia smiled. "Of course it's alright, Athrun."

Dearka walked up to him, once more, and "patted" his back again. "At a boy, Zala! Hey, since Kira's going, maybe his sis will show up, too! Wouldn't that be totally awesome?"

They all walked outside of his apartment room as Athrun turned to lock the room.

"Yeah….great…"

_When the car broke down_

"So….Athrun….how is Cagalli?" Yzak asked as they all crunched up inside the really small car.

_We just kept walking along_

"I…really don't want to talk about that right now, if that's okay with you," Athrun said dejectedly as he leaned in on his seat.

_Till we hit this town_

Yzak opened his mouth and Shiho saw. Sitting behind him, she kicked the driver's seat constantly to warn him to either shut up or get killed before having children.

"Of course grunt that's okay grunt and kick with him kick," she said in a dangerously low voice, kicking his seat every other word.

And since then, not one word was spoken.

_There was nothing there at all_

Not even 10 minutes passed and they were already at the restaurant.

As he stepped out of the vehicle, Athrun asked, "What is this place called?"

_But that was all okay_

"Gee, Zala, did you just get stupid after the war? Read the damn sign," Yzak muttered as he rubbed the back of his head to relieve him of the pain his wrathful fiancée's onslaught in the car.

**Midsummer Night's Dream**

_We spent all our money on stupid things_

They were seated by the waiter, and Yzak boasted that they were the best seats in the house.

"But wasn't it Kira's idea to eat here in the first place? So he reserved the seats," Dearka replied wryly as he watched his friend's face turn red in embarrassment.

_But if I look back now, I'd probably give it all away_

They all laughed. There was hardly ever a moment they could make Yzak look stupid. This was just one of those Kodak moments.

Dearka immediately turned to face Athrun, who surprisingly wasn't even fazed and laughed. "What's wrong, Athrun? You never _not_ laugh at stuff like this. Is it Caga --"

_Just for one more day_

"OUCH!"

Miriallia had just kicked him under the table and gave him a "Shut up while you're still ahead" look.

"Fine! Fine! I'll shut up!" he exclaimed, his hands up in the air in surrender.

_One more day with you_

Right now, more than anything, he felt so alone. He watched as Yzak and Shiho exchanged these "I hate you, but goddamnit, I still love you" looks. And Dearka and Miriallia were just saying how sorry they were for doing/saying what they did. How he just wished to be in their shoes. How he wished to be just like them. How he wished she were still with him.

_Every time I see your face_

Dearka had just about shot this evening while still waiting for Kira and Lacus to arrive. "What the hell is taking them so long?" he whined as he motioned the waiter for another drink.

"Oh no, you don't. You've had your share for now," she scolded to Dearka, belittling him like any mother would to her son. "We'll call you later," she told the waiter and he left.

_Every time you look my way_

"They're probably just running a little late. Traffic or something," Shiho reassured, stirring her drink with her finger lazily as she waited patiently for the other to arrive.

_It's like it all falls into place/ Everything feels right_

"For one hour? Honestly! You'd think they could just walk instead! Spare us the wait! I'm starving here!" Yzak whined sinking into his chair like the spoiled little boy that he was.

_Ever since you walked away/ My life's been in disarray/ All I need is one more day with you_

Athrun checked his watch.

8:30 PM

_Now I'm sitting here/ Like we used to do_

Athrun let out a sigh and stood from his seat. The others immediately lost interest in what they were doing and switched their glances to the boy.

"Where are you going, Athrun?" Miriallia asked.

He looked at her, his watch, then back at her. "I'm sorry, you guys, but it's just….well, I'm not gaining much by sitting here to wait and everything…"

_I think about my life and how there's nothing I won't do _

"…Besides, I don't really fit in with this scene, and I'm only taking up space by being here."

_Just for one more day/_ _One more day with you_

"So--" he paused to push in his seat. "I'll just take myself out. Thanks for including me tonight, but I'm just not in the mood after all."

_Every time I see your face/ Every time you look my way_

"But Athrun!"

Athrun didn't bother to turn around, hearing his friends calling out his name. He really wasn't in the mood. Plus, he stood out like a sore thumb while everyone else was being lovey-dovey with their date.

_It's like it all falls into place_

"It's alright, you guys, seriously. I'll just walk home," he insisted as their voices grew louder the farther away he stepped.

_Everything feels right  
_

Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned around to find Kira smiling at him. "Leaving so soon?"

_Every time I hear your name_

"Guess not." Athrun smiled, seeing his best friend after a long time did that to you.

_Every time I feel the same_

He took back his seat beside Yzak and now Kira. Kira had just told him the story of how he and Lacus got married 2 years ago and Lacus had just given birth to two baby boys, who were right now sleeping soundly at home.

_It's like it all falls into place_

"Wow, congratulations Kira, Lacus! Two boys? Wow, I wish I were there to see it."

"Yeah, that's alright, Athrun. We've got some pictures at home. If you want to drop by after dinner, we can show you," Kira said happily, turning around in his chair every other word.

_Everything feels right_

Athrun watched him quizzically. "What are you looking for, Kira?"

Kira snapped back into reality and faced Athrun. "Oh, um, just….someone. They're taking quite a while parking the car."

_You walked away_

"But it's valet parking, isn't it?" Yzak asked, folding his arms around his chest.

"Gee, Yzak, if you knew that, why did you park the car?" Shiho asked dryly, taking a sip of her drink.

"I've just had it up to here" – Yzak pointed up to his forehead – "With you, woman!"

_Just one more day_

"Well, if that's all…" Shiho replied emotionlessly, she continued to sip her drink.

Athrun laughed this time. Everything just seemed like the good old days….just missing one very important person.

Athrun stared up from his plate to look at Kira. "Kira?"

"Hmmm?"

"Is….well….will, um…"

Kira, who was busy sucking up his spaghetti, looked at him worriedly. "What?"

"Hey everyone."

Athrun stopped stuttering and looked behind him. His eyes grew wide with shock. "Cagalli?"

"Cagalli! Glad you could make it!" Lacus cheered as she settled Cagalli beside her.

"Yeah! The parking lot was like filled but we managed to…." She paused as she caught sight of the person before her. "Athrun…?"

The two began to stare each other down and an unknown silence befell on the table. Athrun was in more shock than her, of course.

_That's all I need_

Just when he thought things couldn't get any worse, another person came into the table, a male this time. He had a strongly built figure, brown hair, and the fiercest blue eyes he had ever seen and he had just seated himself beside Cagalli and kissed her lovingly on her cheek.

"Sorry I'm late. Just gave the bell boy our keys and…" he looked at Cagalli who was busy looking at Athrun. He smiled and asked, "Who's your friend, Cagalli? You two seem to know each other very well."

She blinked a couple of times, finally escaping her state of shock, and snapped back into reality. "Sorry about that. Um, Kai, this is Athrun Zala, son of Patrick Zala and a member of ZAFT's elite. Athrun, this is Kai…."

Athrun blinked; still in the same shock he was five seconds ago. For some reason, he just couldn't swallow in what he saw before him. But what she said next would just demolish the very little hope he had for their future.

"….my fiancé."

_Just one more day with you_

gets stoned to near-death by AsuCaga fans

I KNOW YOU HATE ME! GET OVER IT! Right about now in Gundam Seed Destiny, I'm totally not feeling the love connection those two used to have in Gseed. I miss them back then. But now, gah, I'm losing hope. But as a rabid AsuCaga fan for life, I've got no other choice but to love them to bits.

I know I'm being really forward with the torture and fiancé/fiancée's popping out like chicken eggs, but sit back and hopefully next chapter will be a little kinder to you fans.

AHHH! My sick obsession with songs! Next one would probably be another song thingy too. Sorry if you're sick of em or if you don't like my choice of songs. But sorry! Every song has had a weird affect on me writing these things….and I also hear them every time I write….weird, I know.

Oh well, just hang on with me till next chapter. But what will Athrun and Cagalli do now that just about everything's left out in the open? BTW, steshin, if you're reading this, the rating for this story will go up to M in future chapters. Promise.


	4. Addicted

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Seed, it's characters, or main plotline. I don't own the character, Kai. He is owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143, READ HER STORIES! ahem Anywho, I don't own the song "Addicted". It is owned by Simple Plan and their people. Don't accuse me of anything, or I'll get my dog, George "Dub-ya" Bush, to eat you! Sorry if that offended any Bush supporters. xD

checks out reviews…ZOMFG! Steshin! I'm so not worthy! fangurls xxnabiki? OMFG! I know you too! xD, you never answered when I called you like 12 times this weekend! GAH!

Thank you all for not hating me….YET! Fwahah! I want you to actually want to hate me! Gah, fine, if this isn't bad, I guess I'll have to heat things up a bit. FWAHAHA! Thanks for the reviews! Hey, glad some of you also like YzakXShiho! We needed some comic relief.

**Chapter 4 - Addicted**

_I heard you're doing okay_

"_This is Kai…my fiancé…"_

He could not…no…would not accept what he just heard. This could not have been possible!

_But I want you to know_

He couldn't get her words to stop replaying themselves inside his head. "..my fiancé…" And the sickest part, even with that neutral look on her face, she actually looked…_happy._

_I'm a dick_

He could almost wish he never touched one thing on his plate. It was simply sickening to see him feed Cagalli bits and pieces off his plate. Even he never got a chance to do that.

_I'm addicted to you_

But why did he have to care so much? Why couldn't he just stop fidgeting underneath the table? Why couldn't he enjoy his free meal? Why couldn't he just act normal?

Oh yeah.

Because she was with someone else, and enjoying every breathing moment of it. And the worst part? That someone wasn't him.

_I can't pretend I don't care_

She could tell. She could clearly see it in his stare. She snuck a peek or two at him when she turned her head to be fed by Kai, and every time, she felt like gawking as she saw him still staring at her.

Finally, it just got to the point where it annoyed and scared the hell out of her.

"It's impolite to stare."

_When you don't think about me_

Athrun was taken back and quickly swallowed his food before anyone else could see. He blinked a couple of times and his face began to flush as everyone gave him curious looks from around the table.

"Heh heh…great food…" he managed to say as their eyes just made him sink into his seat in embarrassment.

_Do you think I deserve this?_

She giggled as she happily chewed on her food. She simply loved it when she won one over Athrun, especially when other people were around to see it!

She watched him crawl down to his "happy place" and she just couldn't stop giggling softly in her mind. He looked so cute like that, blushing like he was still 16. She had that gift, to make him blush at any given time by just being, well, Cagalli.

But wait!

Why was she dwelling on such thoughts! She was happily engaged to someone who was not Yuna, not Athrun, but clearly better!

_I tried to make you happy _

He still continued to gag uncontrollably under his breath, watching those two feeding one another. It just wasn't fair. But then again, karma was a bitch.

_But you left anyway_

He couldn't lie to himself. Cagalli was completely right to have broken up with him. Mia wasn't an innocent person, but protecting her was a priority he was not willing to trash. He himself didn't know why he had to protect her, but he just knew he'd regret it afterwards.

But right now, it wasn't Mia. It was Cagalli. He had hurt her years back, and now, it was all coming back to him. Yup. With that settled, karma is a bitch.

_I'm trying to forget that_

She felt bad, torturing him like this. She didn't do it on purpose, of course. Kai had always done this every time they ate. It was just a habit and she liked it.

But she swore to God, if he wouldn't stop staring, she'd personally rip his eyes out and make him eat it. Why couldn't he accept that fact that they were over?

_I'm addicted to you_

"Wait here, a sec, Cagalli. I've just got to make a quick trip the men's room. Excuse me," he said ever so politely, that in all ways just made Athrun saw a reflection of himself as the gentleman he was 4 years ago. It was really scary to find someone else who could pass as you, and even more scary to find that person engaged to your ex.

_But I want it/ And I need it/ I'm addicted to you_

Why couldn't he stop staring? He was taking advantage of the fact that Kai wasn't present at the table. He took this time to stare her down, knowing fully that he probably wouldn't have another chance to. Just staring at her not looking back at him just made his knees feel like a pile of goo.

_Now it's over/ Can't forget what you said_

She just couldn't stand it anymore. She had to leave…NOW!

_And I never want to do this again_

She stood up, her chair banging against the wall behind her. Everyone stopped what they were doing, again, and stared up at her.

"I'm going home. Just not…feeling to well, I guess. Tell Kai not to worry. He doesn't need to go home. He needs a break. After all, he's been cooped up in that office longer than I have. If you excuse me…"

_Heartbreaker_

Athrun blinked and watched her walk away, for the second time today. What else in his life could go wrong?

_Since the day I met you/ And after all we've been through_

"Uh…Cagalli, wait!" He looked at the people still seated at the table. "Uh, I should be heading home, too. I mean, it's getting late, and well, I might lose my way, being dark and everything…"

_Still a dick/ I'm addicted to you_

"But it's only 9:22, Athrun. Stay a while!" Dearka pressed, now thoroughly drunk.

"Yeah, and you live like what, 10 minutes away? Gee, live a little," Yzak implied, taking a bite of his lobster.

_I think you know that it's true_

"Yeah, but I really got to get going…so….see ya!"

And he made a run for it, not caring who was in his way. He simply pushed them aside.

_I'd run a thousand miles to get you_

He just caught up with her. She was walking a mere 5 inches ahead, all the while not knowing, and yet he still didn't have the guts to tap her shoulder and offer to walk her home.

_Do you think I deserve this?_

"Face it, Zala, just face it. She's not going to talk to you, especially after tonight…hell, even after this afternoon. Just lay off, Zala…walk home now, while she still might _at least_ want to talk to you. Just go home….back away from the blondie…That's it….nice and slow….you're doing great…"

He just eased himself away, nice and slow. He just didn't have the balls to confront her about everything. She still didn't even know why he did what he did back then. He wanted to tell her bad, so that they could have a new start.

_I tried to make you happy/ I did all that I could_

But, then again, there was this Kai person. He became a new obstacle. But still. If he couldn't have a relationship with Cagalli as her boyfriend, then at least after his confession, they could still be friends.

_Just to keep you/ But you left anyway_

"Yeah, that sounds good. I'll just tell her….maybe….just maybe she might change her mind about marrying Kai. He doesn't seem all that bad…they do seem happy together…who am I to stop them from marrying?"

_I'm trying to forget that I'm addicted to you_

He was home in less time than he thought. Surprise, surprise.

_But I want it/ And I need it/ I'm addicted to you_

She survived walking home, and surprisingly, he wasn't following her. She opened the door to her extremely huge bedroom, with an extremely huge mess lying about that she didn't bother to clean, ever.

_Now it's over/ Can't forget what you said_

She hugged up against her pillow, belly down against the mattress, the only source of light coming from her huge windows next to her bed.

_And I never want to do this again_

Awkward. It seems that the only bits of light were shining on one certain place. Really scary. Her position shifted to a sitting one, still hugging her pillow, and faced the drawer beside her bed, where all the light seemed to be fixed on.

She opened it and dust flew everywhere. I told you it was ages since she cleaned the place up. Her throat grew dry at what she saw.

Her kissing him….all in one precious picture.

_Heartbreaker_

He walked up to his couched and settled himself upon it with a huge "thump" as he landed on the cushions.

_How long will I be waiting/ Until the end of time_

He turned his head to rest on the head of the couch and found a picture frame settled on a side table beside the couch.

He took the frame into his hand and all he could say was "Cagalli…" as one small tear left his eye.

_I don't know why I'm still waiting/ I can't make you mine_

**FLASHBACK**

The two sat laughing on the grass as a cool breeze flew by. They were having a picnic, not exactly knowing what to do, as she was rarely given any chance to treat herself ever.

"So, rolling around in the grass after spending tons of money on these clothes, $40. Pigging out on watermelons, $10. Sitting on the grass while talking to the best girl in the world? Priceless."

She blushed unwillingly and gave him a small peck on cheek number one.

_I'm trying to forget that/ I'm addicted to you_

He shook his finger. "Ah, ah, ah. You're missing one," he said while tapping his other cheek.

_But I want it/ And I need it_

"Fine!" she yelled in surrender and kissed his other cheek.

Click

A flash broke out, and while she was still a little dazed, she did managed to sock him in the stomach for taking a picture of what she just did.

But, I guess, spending time with the one you loved just made you do crazy things…even if it did hurt you back…

_I'm addicted to you_

She let out a sigh and her eyes gazed softly at the phone beside her, on the nightstand. She could just give him a call. You know, to apologize for how she acted.

_Now it's over/ Can't forget what you said_

"What am I saying? Me? Apologize to him? When he was the one interrogating my personal space? Yeah right…"

_And I never wanna do this again_

That's it. He really did need to talk to her. He just couldn't stand having her not knowing. He didn't like being second best. He knew, deep down inside, she still loved him. He knew it.

_Heartbreaker_

Kira felt something deep inside….that something would happen that night that might make him regret letting those two off. He knew something would happen, he just couldn't tell how serious it would get. Knowing Cagalli, it would go to the point where it became dead serious.

_I'm addicted to you_

"Is everything alright, Kira?" Kai asked, as he took a sip of his beverage.

"Yeah, fine. Are you sure you don't want to go home and check on her, Kai?" Kira pleaded, a tone of concern in his voice.

"Positive. I trust Cagalli, Kira, and she's a woman with bite. If anyone tried to hurt her by now, they'd be in crutches. She's home now, safe and sound in her bedroom," Kai reassured.

"Yeah…with Athrun…." Kira thought sadly. He knew that Athrun still had more than enough feelings for her, and that she broke up with him soon before he could tell her. Athrun, though still struggling with his inner thoughts, could make up anytime, and just visit Cagalli. He did know where she lived.

Don't get him wrong though. Kira thought that Athrun was still very deserving of Cagalli, even though he did choose to protect an impersonator over his own girlfriend. At that time, Athrun was still lost in his thoughts, confused and alone more than anything. He couldn't blame him to choose what he had done, but it was still wrong of him.

Kira liked Kai. He was great, and in a time period of four years, he became almost like an "Athrun replacement". I mean, his attitude basically screamed Athrun itself. Yeah sure, at first, it kind of scared Kira and Cagalli how similar those two were. But, he could tell, there was something about Kai that made Cagalli love him, and it wasn't because he was just like Athrun. There was just something…_extra_. He couldn't quite pick out what, but there was something.

But now, being her big brother, he wasn't sure of whom he should be rooting for, if anyone, for the matter. This was Cagalli's life he was sticking his nose into; he had no right doing so. But for now, all he had to do was trust her, even if she chose the wrong thing.

_Heartbreaker_

So, that's chapter four! Ireally wanted to lighten up the story a bit. Too much angst gets me angsting…and that's not pretty. xD. Well, things will darken up next chapter.

Short preview – Kira still has that nagging feeling, and the worst part is, the thing he didn't want to happen, happens!(Ain't fate a bitch, right along with karma?) xD. I really didn't want a CoughlemonCough this early, but, meh, for I'll keep it clean. If you want it dirty, reply to me next chapter if you want that lemon bad. Mmk?

Happy trails!


	5. Again

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or main plotline. I don't own the character, Kai; he belongs to JC-Titans143. He's the coolest thing ever, and that's why I asked to use him in my story! squee

I don't own the song "Again". It's owned by Lenny Kravitz and his people.

I blame VH1 and insomnia for this sudden burst of genius. The music video also helped for that lemon. xD. Yes, I think I told steshin, but I guess I'll tell everyone. This chapter was another songfic, and unlike past chapters, this one was a helluva lot harder to pick a song out for. 30 songs to choose from…GOD! Anywho…

**Chapter 5 – Again**

_I've been searching for you_

Taking one last look at that picture, letting one last tear stroll down his cheek, he placed the picture frame back into its place and made his way towards the door.

_I heard a cry within my soul_

He wanted to, needed to, drop-dead had to talk to her. She was like a magnet that pulled him towards her, without ever trying to, even when she didn't want him there. That was his current situation.

_I never had a yearning quite like this before_

He wanted to have a clear conscious. That's all. He would swear it in God's name if he could, but he just wasn't the kind of man to swear period. So let's just say, he _promises _on his mother's grave.

_Now that you are walking right through my door_

He wanted her to know why he left, why he had to, and why he couldn't stay. Every way you look at it, it was all for her, but he just never showed it well. He wasn't gifted that way.

_All of my life_

This might be his last chance to ever say what he felt, even if she didn't feel the same way in turn. She just had to know, and tonight, she'd know everything.

_Where have you been?_

She stared silently outside her window, watching as waves crashed into the shore in one fluid motion. She started feeling restless, thinking whether she should have left or not.

_I wonder if I'll ever see you again_

She wondered how Kira was doing. Lacus, Yzak, Miriallia. She left them all because she was rather selfish. She wondered how Kai was doing.

_A sacred gift of heaven/ For better, worse, wherever_

He walked casually on the brightened streets of ORB. And what else should he be doing? It was a beautiful night. He grinned to himself. _He_ would make it beautiful. _He_ would just for _her_.

_And I would never let somebody break you down_

Especially, she was wondering of that cursed Athrun. He didn't do anything wrong by showing up, but his staring just ruined her night. "Stupid Athrun…."

_Or take your crown, never_

But through it all, she wanted the truth. She just didn't want it with a kiss. A talk. That's all she ever wanted.

_All of my life/ Where have you been?_

He passed by the restaurant he ditched a little while back.

_I wonder if I'll ever see you again_

He found them all getting quite red, drunk no doubt, laughing and drinking the night away. I guess there was nothing else they would do. It's been a while since they all last talked. But what would he know? He hadn't seen Kira or Lacus since 4 four years back. He didn't care enough to keep in contact with anyone other than Dearka and Yzak.

_And if that day comes/ I know we could win_

Of course he was more than tempted to contact Cagalli, hell, even so far as to walking up to her doorstep with a box of chocolates and with a warm "Hello". You know that movie "Jerry Maguire"? Yeah. He just _wanted her at "Hello"_.

_I wonder if I'll ever see you again_

But now, he just couldn't get what he wanted. Especially because of her new engagement. Why did he never pay attention to those damned news interruptions? Surely then he would've found out and maybe it wouldn't haven come to him as that much of a surprise.

_I've searched through time, I've always known_

It was a rare occasion for her to ever have a break. Really rare. She loved the smell of salty sea air. She never knew why. She just did.

She opened the windows that kept her away from that scent. Never had she seen the water glimmer as it did that night. Maybe it was because it was a full moon, who really takes time to care nowadays? She just found it beautiful.

_That you were there, upon your throne_

He recognized the area he was in. Less people walking, a lot more vegetation beside the walkway, and less streetlights blinding his view.

_A lonely queen, without her king_

He was here.

_I've longed for you, my love forever_

He took in a deep breath, stuffing his newly sweating palms into his pockets, taking his time as he walked closer to the Athha Estate.

_All of my life_

Her eyes began to droop themselves into a close until something, just one thing, caught her interest. Someone was walking towards her home. "At this time of night?" she thought worriedly.

_Where have you been?_

A knock. She scrambled to the door, tripping over several scattered objects across the floor.

_I wonder if I'll ever see you again_

"W-who is it?" she asked, somewhat scared, her hand trembling slightly at the door handle.

_And if that day comes_

"Athrun. Athrun Zala."

_I know we could win_

Sighing in relief, she turned the knob on the door to welcome in her….friend. "What are you doing here?" she asked, somewhat curious.

_All of my life_

One eyebrow rose at this question. "You don't want me here?"

_Where have you been?_

She crossed her arms, one foot lightly tapping against the floor in annoyance. "Not exactly. What do you want, Athrun?"

_I wonder if I'll ever see you again_

"To talk," he said coolly, taking a seat on her bed. He patted the mattress below him. "Come…let's talk."

_And if that day comes_

Kira's head turned in the direction of where Cagalli's room would be.

_I know we could win_

"What's wrong, Kira?"

He turned to his side to face Lacus and Kai, the only ones who haven't been completely overtaken by drunkenness.

"Nothing…I just…felt a little indigestion…that's all."

_I wonder if I'll ever see you again_

He felt him there…with Cagalli. This was wrong. Kai did not deserve this. "Don't do it, Cagalli…"

_I wonder if I'll ever see you again_

"Does this conversation have any kissing involved?" she asked, still tapping her foot impatiently on the floor.

Athrun shook his hands before him, a tinted blush on his cheeks. "No, no, no. I just…well, I wanted to clear up things. I wanted to tell you why I left everything behind…because of Mia. I want to leave this room having a clean conscience." He bit his tongue, thinking of words as he went.

_I wonder if I'll ever see you again_

"I want to tell you everything."

She blinked her eyes in disbelief, her foot finally ceasing its tapping. She smiled softly, but weakly, and padded across her bedroom floor. Not once breaking eye contact, she took a seat next to him on her ridiculously huge bed.

"Well, start talking…"

_I wonder if I'll ever see you again_

Well, there ya go. I decided to lighten up the feel. Um, after my bonus lemon chapter IN MY LIVEJOURNAL, everything will angst up again. Yes, there will be more angst. MWAHAHAH! Anywho, check out my profile from time to time to see if I posted up that lemon. Hope I won't disappoint anyone.

Kai is such a great character. And yet, completely oblivious. Anyway, there will be a future chapter concerning his character and how he met Cagalli. But gah, I have no idea how to continue on this darn story. So many possibilities. I'm just thinking up stuff as I go. Well, start reviewing, and happy trails!


	6. Shame On Me Edited

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I also don't own the character Kai. He's owned by JC-Titans143, WHO TOTALLY ROCKS MY WORLD! ahem

I don't own the song "Shame On Me". That's owned by Ryan Cabrera and his people.

So, chapter 6….ALREADY? Holy . So, that lemon….gah! I've decided and this is final! The chapter will be posted on otherwise, you wouldn't be reading this, but the lemon segment will be posted on my LJ, for the curious. And no, the rating will stay on T and won't advance any further to M, sadly. Yes, all the adult material sticks on my LJ. giggle giggle

So, on with the chapter!

**Chapter 6 – Shame On Me

* * *

**

_I know you wanna talk/ Tell me about your day_

"Well, Cagalli, I can totally write a whole book of reasons why I feel like shit now, and why I left. If you really don't want me here, then I guess I'll…"

_But I keep wandering off_

She growled under her breath, pulling at his arm, pushing him back down on her bed. "Dammit, Zala. If you've got something to say, just say it! Cut the crap already!" she yelled, getting quite restless, obviously.

_Ooh how your hair/ Falls in front of your face_

But knowing Athrun, he just couldn't pay attention. Remember that one spot of moonlight? Now it was cascading over her pretty little blonde head, emitting about radiance in the space around her. She was simply glowing and he could not take his eyes off her for one second.

_While you try to keep it up_

She eyed him curiously, wrapping her arms around herself self consciously, his gaze making her feel uncomfortable more than when she was at the restaurant. "What are you looking at?"

_I've always paid attention to your point of view

* * *

_

Meanwhile, at the restaurant, Kira had that same feeling bouncing off the walls of his head. It was screaming, "Go home, Kira! Go home! Cagalli needs you! Get Kai to come with you! Just go home, HOME!"

But he didn't want to believe what he was feeling. Once more, he brushed his worries to the side and tried to enjoy his time with his friends.

Kai saw Kira getting oddly quiet. "Kira…what's the matter? You're not enjoying yourself?"

Kira looked up to his companion. God, Kai really did not deserve this. "No, I'm fine. Just worried about the kids."

"You sure? I can drive you home if you want."

"No, no. I think I'll be fine. Hey, where's that waitress with my beer!" Kira hollered, trying his best to get that nagging feeling away. He just couldn't help it. Cagalli was family, and hell, Kai would be his family soon, too. But now, Athrun came back in the picture, right when he wasn't supposed to. Shit! Talk about a crappy date with Lady Luck. "Come on, Cagalli…Don't do this…"

* * *

_But now I wanna focus on the rest of you_

Athrun simply couldn't stop staring! She was just his eye candy and he wanted to taste it so badly.

"WHAT!" she screamed for the third time in a row.

_Shame on me wanting you/ The way I fantasize about_

"Sorry, it's just that…well, we've been separated so long, I forgot how beautiful you are at night…how gorgeous you look in the dark…how delicious you taste after sunset…how you feel when you're in be--"

_What I'd give/ What I'd do/ I just wanna work you out_

She stopped him from going any further with her index pressed firmly against his lips. She was clearly embarrassed with the fact he remembered _that_ much, it clearly showed on her crimson cheeks. "Enough, alright? Now tell me, why did you leave?"

He looked up at her confused and she in turn raised an eye brow in response. "Isn't that why you came here in the first place?"

_Times like this I'm so glad that you can't read my mind_

He shook his head and slowly opened his mouth, allowing her index finger to slide inside. He closed his eyes as he savored her flavor. Oh, God, she tasted so good. Softly, he started sucking on the finger, his tongue running up and down, brushing against her angel-soft skin. He wanted more. He wanted - -

_Shame on me another time_

SLAP!

She nailed him right on his head and he fell off the bed as a result. "Dammit, Zala! Did you come here to tell me the truth or…or…WHAT!"

_Please don't walk away _

"Sorry! Sorry! I'm really sorry! Look, it's hormones, I swear!"

She continued to glare him down, no mercy.

"Okay, let's talk for real now."

_I'm only drifting 'cause you look so good tonight_

"Alright, Cagalli," he said with a sigh of relief that she didn't kick him in the balls as he took a seat back on her bed. "Let's see. Mia. God knows how much I couldn't tolerate that girl, God knows that Cagalli. But I had to protect her life. The people of PLANT wanted her dead for daring to impersonate Lacus Clyne in the first place! I didn't find it right that she was taking the identity of Lacus, but she doesn't need to be killed because of it!"

"Keep going…"

He sighed. She was not convinced at all. "Cagalli…you were with Kira and Andrew and the whole Archangel crew at the time. Mia had no one. Gilbert sold her out, Cagalli! He sold her out! It wasn't fair for her. The world was against her, Cagalli, can't you understand? You were safe, you didn't need me! You even told me yourself, that you were very capable of protecting yourself! That time, I chose to believe you could, that's why I chose to protect Mia!"

She frowned and her grip tightened on the sheet covers. "That doesn't tell me anything…"

_Now that we're alone/ It's so hard to listen_

"Cagalli," he whispered as he cupped one side of her cheek into his hand. "Please. You didn't need me back then…you…you didn't want me…"

She looked at him and felt one of his tears roll down off his face, and on to her thigh. Yeah, wonder. She was wearing a SKIRT! Sorry, anyway…

Hey eyes widened in shock and immediately her brows furrowed and she slapped him, yet again. The impact was strong and he looked up at her with teary eyes and a lost expression. "Didn't want you? Where the hell did you pick up that bullshit, Zala? I did want you! I waited everyday of my life for you to come back! And you did!" she screamed, but allowed her voice to hush.

"Look, I really don't care anymore why you left, Athrun. I really don't. I don't care if you hug her, kiss her, sleep with her; I don't care."

_You know you got me mesmerized_

"I didn't do any of that, Cagalli. I swear!"

She growled again, her hand up in the air, threatening another slap to his cheek if he continued to interrupt. "I told you already. I don't fuckin' care!"

_I've always paid attention to your point of view_

He began to cry again, and this time, he cried on her lap. Damn, it really was a short skirt, something a girl like Cagalli would never ever be caught dead in…until now. He cried and gripped the sides on her skirt and he felt her brush a hand through his hair.

"Athrun," she whispered softly. "Please, don't so this. You already know why we can't be together. I'm getting married, Athrun, married. Nothing can happen between us…"

"Cagalli…do you remember…that time in the desert…when I promised I'd come back for you…and that after that, we'd get married…have kids…live in a mansion…" he stuttered, gripping tightly on her skirt.

"Yeah…"

"I want that, Cagalli…I really do…"

"You had your chance…"

"Yeah, and I took it there…in the desert…do you remember that night?"

**FLASHBACK**

She woke up, sore, red all over, but overall, she felt good. Scratch that. Great. She felt like dancing on cloud nine. She just felt too good to be true.

She smiled softly as she gathered the blanket and wrapped it around herself, almost all of it used to cover her chest area, leaving her back naked, waist up. A sigh of relief escaped her to find her partner still sleeping on the bed, a light snore escaping him every once in a while.

She bent over and caressed his sweat-soaked cheek. "I love you, too, Athrun Zala…"

**END FLASHBACK**

_But now I wanna focus on the rest of you_

She smiled weakly at the memory. She just remembered it…all too well. "Yeah."

"I want you back, Cagalli."

She couldn't believe this boy. His audacity was overwhelming. "I already told you, you had your chance, Athrun. And you wasted it when you left me for Mia Campbell! You wasted it!"

_Shame on me wanting you_

She noticed he had stopped crying, but she still felt something wet brush up against her legs. She looked down intriguingly to find Athrun at first kissing, licking, and now nipping at her soft flesh and he was so into it, too.

_The way I fantasize about_

"I want you back," he whispered breathily, as he continued on pushing her to follow him, or kick his balls. He wanted to leave this house happy, one way or another.

_What I'd give/ What I'd do/ I just wanna work you out

* * *

_

"Kai."

He looked up from his drink to meet with Kira's lavender eyes. "What is it, Kira?"

He bit his tongue once more and decided to save it. "…Never mind…how's that drink?"

* * *

_Times like this I'm so glad that you can't read my mind_

"I want you back," he repeated, his hot breath blowing against her legs.

"Athrun," she whispered as she tried to pry him away from her. Why wouldn't it work? She tried to pry his hands away from her skirt, and instead he gripped her wrists and banged her back against the pillows.

She was shocked. He did want her back…and he wasn't going to leave without her.

_Shame on me another time

* * *

_

So, this is chapter 6 edited, meaning no lemon. BUT! Keep an eye on my LJ for that lemon. Right now, it's still on the works! So anyway, what will Cagalli end up doing? Will she fall for Athrun? Or will she end up leaving him...AGAIN!...for Kai? Is Kira just going to sit back and wait for his sister to get raped? Who knows.Idon't! And I'm the author!Oh well. HAPPY TRAILS!


	7. Thank You

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I also don't own the UBER AWESOME CHARACTER Kai. He's happily owned by JC-Titans143. I don't own the song "Thank You". It's owned by Simple Plan (again) and their people.

The first few parts are from the unedited chapter and are italicized. I thought, "What the hey…some people won't have the balls to read that lemon…so I'll just post the kid-friendly part here…" And I did, so there.

For the slow and ignorant: I did post that lemon on my Livejournal. Wanna know how to get there? Well, it's really easy. Go to my profile and click "homepage". Then it should be the first thing you see on the right, alright?Good… With that settled….

**Chapter 7 – Thank You

* * *

**

_She lay in his arms, a smile on her faces clear even in the dark. He smiled and he knew he had her for sure. "I love you, Cagalli, and I know you won't leave me again…" He snuggled up close, pulling the blanket over their sweaty selves, and allowing sleep to take them over._

_As he was doing so, her eyes flickered open. She felt his arms wrapped around her and she knew what she had just done. She just slept with Athrun Zala, all the while being engaged to be married to Kai. Once realization had taken full impact on her, she pushed the boy off her bed._

_He stared at her from the floor, stuck in a state of confusion. "C-Cagalli?"_

_She wrapped the blanket around herself and stood next to him. "Athrun…I can't believe you. I'm engaged, you bastard! Engaged! Get out of my house! I don't ever want to see your face ever again!"_

"_But…"_

_She glared and threw him his clothes. "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE, BASTARD!"_

_He stood there, his clothes piled up before him. He stared at her, completely dumbfounded. He thought he had her for sure, he thought she loved him. "Cagalli…"_

"_Get out!" she screamed, tears forming in her eyes. "Dammit, Zala! Get out!" She was on the verge of tears, and so was he._

"_I love you…" he whispered, gathering his clothes in his arms, reaching a hand towards her cheek._

_She swatted his hand away. "I don't want to hear it, Athrun. Get the hell out of my face and don't ever think of coming near me again!" She pulled him up, and led him out the door and slammed it in his face._

_He sighed sadly, put his clothes on, and walked out the Athha door. As he walked outside, it began to rain. Stuffing his hands in his pocket he promised himself one thing. "I won't stop loving you…."_

_She tightened the blanket close around her. She was just raped by the one she used to love. But she ended up loving it. "Dammit. I'm such a bitch…Kai…I'm so sorry…" She looked out the window to find it raining and her lover was out there, walking away. For good she hoped. It was only for the best. He should never have came in the first place. He knew, but he was just stubborn. She loved Kai….didn't she? She stared out the window and found Athrun staring back at her. "…I…I…I love you, too…."

* * *

_

_I thought that I could always count on you_

Finally, being the only people left in the restaurant, which currently was open way past its closing hours, they finally decided to go on home. Kai was able to talk Miriallia out of driving Yzak, Dearka, and Shiho home and he insisted upon driving them in her place.

Of course, Kira with his nagging feeling thought that that would be excellent and he could just walk home later, in case what he felt with Cagalli did indeed happen. Lacus was kind of in enough of a sober state to be worried about her children and her sister-in-law.

_I thought that nothing could come between us two_

Kira was eager to get home, and Kai and Lacus could not figure out why. Sure, he could've been worried about his sister, who didn't even call to say she got home safe and sound, but this was too much. It started to worry everyone around him, especially Kai. Once Kira got his head into something, Kai would jump right along beside him and stick his head into that something as well. I guess it was normal for him, as well. He was, after all, her fiancé.

_We said as long as we would stick together_

Kira drove off ahead with Lacus, leaving Kai alone in a car of drunken friends. Oh well. Some things were more important and right now, that something was his sister.

_We'd be alright/ We'd be okay_

Lacus became concerned with his rough driving. He had barely taken a sip of his twenty-times ordered beer and he was still driving like a drunk man.

_But I was stupid/ And you broke me down_

Lacus, in her worry, placed a hand on his shoulder. He immediately slowed down his driving as they reached a red light and he looked at her.

"Kira…she's fine."

_I'll never be the same again_

"Lacus..." he started, as he placed a foot on the gas and began driving at a slower rate. "I want to believe that…but…I just have this feeling…"

_So thank you for showing me_

"I know, Kira…"

He looked at her. She had that same concern as well. I guess being married had its effects on you.

"I have that same feeling…"

_That best friends cannot be trusted_

"We never should have let her go…." he said in a hushed voice, his grip tightening around the steering wheel.

* * *

_And thank you for lying to me_

"Good night you guys. You're going to have one helluva hangover tomorrow. Just try to catch some sleep. And Dearka! No sneaking in to Miriallia's room!" Kai demanded playfully as he closed their apartment door, finally ready to get home to his love.

_Your friendship and good times we had you can have them back_

Jumping out the exit door, he walked home. But that feeling Kira gave him all night, came back to haunt him. Concern. "How are you, Cagalli?"

* * *

_I wonder why it always has to hurt_

He parked the car, slammed his door closed and banged the entrance door open. Rushing up the stairs in the dark almost guaranteed him a head on collision with the floor. Surprisingly, he didn't trip. He just had to make sure she was alright.

_For every lesson that you have to learn_

He slowly opened the door to her room. She was there, as he expected. And to his shock, she did do what he feared most.

_I won't forget what you did to me_

Gripping the sheets beside her stripped, sleeping body, he noticed the red marks that tattooed her body and the tear stains on her face.. "No…."

_How you showed me things_

He gritted his teeth in anger and took in deep, harsh breaths. As he cooled down slowly, he reached for her disheveled and forgotten clothes on the floor. Pulling the blanket slowly away, he lifted her gently and put on her shirt and slowly slid back on her panties.

_I wish I'd never seen_

Lacus was at the door, watching. She couldn't believe it herself. Stepping up beside her husband, she held on tightly to his arm. "Kira…he can't find out…"

_But I was stupid_

"I know…" he whispered and led themselves out her door.

* * *

_And you broke me down_

Now stepping inside the Athha mansion, Kai did his best to dry his clothing, as drenched as they were.

_I'll never be the same again_

He noticed Kira and Lacus stepping down the central grand staircase. "Hey guys. Just got home. Is she alright?"

_So thank you for showing me_

Kira smiled. His innocence and baffled mind was just not ready for the truth. "She's fine. But, can you wait until tomorrow to greet her? She seemed really tired."

_That best friends cannot be trusted_

Kai smiled. "Yeah, sure. Shouldn't you guys be heading off to bed? It's midnight."

_And thank you for lying to me_

"We will," Lacus said, her grip on Kira's arm tightening. "Just after some coffee. Would you like to join us?"

_Your friendship, the good times we had, you can have them back_

"I think I'll pass. I'll be hitting the hay now. Way too tired to even walk. Seeing Cagalli tomorrow will make everything alright, though."

Kira frowned and turned his face away. "Poor Kai…"

"Well, say goodnight to the kids for me, and sweet dreams," he wished, a small yawn escaping him as he walked up the steps to his room right next to Cagalli's.

"Yeah," Kira mumbled. "Sweet dreams…"

_When the tables turn again_

Lacus placed a cup of coffee in front of Kira. She sat beside him, concerned with him as well. "Kira…"

_You'll remember me my friend_

Taking the cup in his hands, he allowed the warmth to be soaked up by them. "I can't believe she did…"

_You'll be wishing I was there for you_

"Kira…I doubt she wanted to…"

_I'll be the one you miss the most_

"I agree," he responded quickly, his grip tightening around the mug. "It was all his fault…"

_But you'll only find my ghost_

"Kira, you can't possibly mean that…"

_As time goes by/ You'll wonder why/ You're all alone_

Kira growled and looked at her angrily, causing her to jump back in his sudden reaction. "Of course it was! Lacus, it was obvious! He's to blame for everything that's happened to her! He's the reason why she's sad! He's the reason why she's…she's...she's like this now…"

Rubbing his arm in comfort, Lacus hushed the boy. "Kira…"

_So thank you for showing me/ That best friends cannot be trusted_

"I hate him, Lacus…He should never have showed his face to her…not now…not ever…"

_And thank you for lying to me_

"Kira…"

_Your friendship and good times we had, you can have them back_

"I'll never forgive him, Lacus."

_So thank you, for lying to me_

"But Kira…"

_So thank you, for all the times you let me down_

"But what, Lacus!" he yelled, his breathing harshening with each word. "Do you think I want to go up to him, give him a hug, and say all is forgiven? No Lacus! No! He raped my sister, Lacus! He called me his best friend, and so did I. I thought I could trust him, Lacus, I really did! And what did he do in terms of that trust? He raped my sister! You saw it didn't you! Do you really expect me to go ahead and say it's alright? Do you really think I'd let him get away with what he did?"

_So thank you, for lying to me_

"I understand Kira, but you don't have to take it this far…"

_So thank you,_

"Don't have to take it this far, huh?" he asked, chuckling shortly after. "Lacus, I will take it this far, farther even. What he did…it can never be taken away. It will stay with him, it will stay with her, and it will stay with me. Lacus…Athrun doesn't deserve to live after this. I have to deal with him….personally…"

_Your friendship, you can have it back

* * *

_

FWAHAHA! Kira's wanting major revenge! Fwahah! Pity Athrun and Cagalli for all I care! It just gets worse from here! FWAHAHA! hack hack hack Um, yeah, Kai's really oblivious, again, but forget it. Things will change for him, I promise. He's gonna be the reason why Cagalli becomes happy all over again and once more forget about Athrun. FWHAHAAH! Review if you dare!


	8. The Reason

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the uber awesome character Kia. He is happily owned by JC-Titans143.

I don't own the totally overplayed song "The Reason". That song is owned by Hoobastank and their people. FINALLY! A song not by Simple Plan! Sorry if you're sick of their songs. They just totally fit in with the story…what can I say?

And people, people, people. Calm yourselves. This IS, I repeat, IS an AsuCaga fic. Yes, an AsuCaga fic! But, I just want to be evil and give them something to quarrel over. But nonetheless, it is an AsuCaga fic and they will end up together. For Kai, I've got no clue what to do with him, but he will have his future.

**Chapter 8 – The Reason

* * *

**

_I'm not a perfect person_

Athrun walked home in the rain, and despite the weather, he walked on.

"_I don't ever want to see your face ever again!"_

A pang of pain hit his chest as those words echoed in his head and tortured his broken heart. It hurt like hell, but he couldn't have been more deserving. He raped her without guilt and enjoyed every breathing moment of it.

_There's many things I wish I didn't do_

So that was it, huh? It was over?

He took a seat on a bench by the bus stop and watched puddles grow larger as it continued to rain. He promised to never stop loving her, but what was the point, especially when the woman you loved didn't want to love you back?

_But I continue learning_

The bus finally came, but not before it ran over a puddle, splashing the murky water on him, drenching him further. Suppressing a growl, he waited for the door to open to enter.

And as he entered, a hand on his chest stopped him. "No way, dude. You should've brought an umbrella or something. You're not riding this bus when you're that wet. Sorry, but you'll have to walk home."

_I never meant to do those things to you_

This just wasn't his day at all. Without a word, he jumped off the bus, which splashed him again as it rode off, and walked back home, alone and heartbroken.

_And so I have to say before I go_

"Even if you don't want me," he whispered silently, "I'll never stop loving you, Cagalli."

_That I just want you to know_

She woke from her not-so-pleasant dreams to find herself with her shirt and panties on. "They're home," she thought silently. But she panicked in her mind, wondering if Kai found her like she was.

_I've found a reason for me_

Slipping out her door and closing it softly behind her with a click, she snuck into Kai's room next door on her tip toes.

_To change who I used to be_

She found him sleeping sound, his blanket wrapped around his well-built figure, moving with his rising chest as he took in light breaths. A small "achoo" startled her as she inched closer to his bedside. She smiled. "He must've walked in the rain," she thought, snuggling up beside him.

_A reason to start over new_

She traced the strong frame of his face gently with her index finger. How innocent he looked sleeping, but she knew better. His fierce blue eyes were sheltered with his closed lids as he snored softly under her light touch. His lips began to form a smile as he felt her caressing his lips with her baby-soft index.

_And the reason is you_

His eyes slowly opened to have his blue eyes shone by the moonlight glow. With that soft smile still playing on his lips, he greeted her, "Good morning."

She giggled softly. "It's not morning yet, Kai."

_I'm sorry that I hurt you_

Athrun threw his drenched jacket on the couch and plopped himself on his bed, wet clothes and all. Hugging on to the pillow, he imagined it to be Cagalli and held on tighter. Just then, he remembered what he had just done to her. He raped her, and that's why she hated him. But nonetheless, he held on to the pillow, still willing to believe it was indeed her.

_It's something I must live with everyday_

She ran her fingers through his soft brown hair as he pressed her body against his. "Cagalli, I can't wait…"

"For what?"

"Our wedding day, when we can finally be together, start that family you and I have always dreamed of…oh I'm just so excited, Cagalli. And you can help me make it possible," he said dreamily, looking up at her glowing golden eyes.

_And all the pain I put you through_

He couldn't forget, he wouldn't forget. He wanted her, _needed_ her, even. He wanted her back, but he just realized tonight, after this day, he just couldn't have her. And now, he was barely a face in her mind after what he'd done tonight.

_I wish that I could take it all away_

"I…I…"

She was stuttering as tears threatened to fall once more from her eyes. Worried, he cupped one side of her face, his thumb wiping away a falling tear. He gave her a gentle smile. "We don't have to marry this soon if you don't want to, Cagalli."

_And be the one who catches all your tears_

She was his _obsession_. She was the reason why he wanted to stay a live. She was the reason why he did what he did, but he just couldn't understand why she had failed to see that. "Because she's marrying Kai…" he said sadly, gripping the pillow closer to his body.

_That's why I need you to hear_

"No," she insisted softly. "I want to get married, Kai. I never knew you expected so much from us."

He smiled, placing a stray blonde bang behind her ear. "Can I expect anything less of a woman like you? Cagalli, you make me happier than anything in the world, and being married to you is more than a blessing from God. To me, it's heaven on Earth."

_I've found a reason for me_

"Kira…we should be heading off to bed," Lacus implied, as she finished off with the dishes.

_To change who I used to be_

Sighing, Kira stood up, unfolding his clenched hands. "You're right, Lacus. A good night's rest ought to make me feel better."

_A reason to start over new_

He started off to bed with a hand placed gently over his wife's waist. Leaving her by the steps, he walked to Cagalli's room, only to find her not there.

_And the reason is you_

Lacus smiled and called Kira softly over. Pointing through the like crack separating the door from them, Kira smiled, too, seeing something right this whole night.

_I'm not a perfect person_

Despite the rain drenching his clothing, the strong scent of _her _stained his clothing.

_I never meant to do those things to you_

"_Get the hell out of my face and don't ever think of coming near me again!"_

Her words kept on ringing in his ears. It pained him that she felt another way.

_And so I have to say before I go_

"Kira…he can help me…" he muttered softly, lost in his own world, holding on to his "Cagalli" pillow and inhaling her scent off his clothes.

_That I just want you to know_

"He can help me…he can bring me closer to her…" he said softly, sleep once more taking over his eyes as they drooped down to a close.

_I've found a reason for me_

Cagalli felt another set of tears coming on. What he said to her…it was so beautiful. Like nothing she had ever heard before. No one had ever shown her this kind of love since….Athrun….

_To change who I used to be_

She shook her head softly as she laid it on his chest. "Kai…that was so beautiful…"

_A reason to start over new_

He rubbed her back gently and soothed her pain away without even knowing it. "Of course. Nothing less for the most beautiful girl in the world…"

_And the reason is you_

Kira and Lacus smiled as they took on last look at the lovers. Closing their door gently, they walked towards their room with the sleeping twins. "I have high hopes for them…" Lacus whispered.

_I found a reason to show_

"Who?" Kira asked, draping his hand over her waist.

_A side of me you didn't know_

"Cagalli and Kai, of course," she said with a cheerful tone, despite how tired she was. But in her mind, she really did want Athrun and Cagalli to be together. Kai was a great boy, but he wasn't for Cagalli. She just knew it. Tonight justified that.

_A reason for all that I do_

"Cagalli?" he asked, tilting her chin up with his finger.

"Yes?"

He smiled and pulled her in close enough that her lips could feel his hot breath on them. "I love you…" And he dipped her head in for a kiss.

She warmed up to him and returned the kiss with much more fervor than she ever gave him before. "I love you, too…" she moaned in between kisses as she gasped for breath.

It was true. She did, and she wasn't going to let Athrun Zala stop her from loving the man she cared for.

_And the reason is you

* * *

_

EVIL I AM! FWAAHAH! Cagalli just said she loved two people! But next chapter ought to spread some light on the topic. Um, and Athrun's looking for some trouble, thinking Kira's gonna actually help him…HA! I laugh at my own cruelty! And Lacus just revealed who she's for. OHH! What's she gonna do in the future? FWAHAH! Stay tuned and do yourself a favor and BE HEARD writing a REVIEW!


	9. Big Apple Heartbreak

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

I don't own the song that's currently playing itself over and over on my iPod, "Big Apple Heartbreak". It's owned by Yellowcard and their people.

A/N: I'm well aware that the title of this song is completely irrelevant with the story's setting. No, the story won't magically change its setting to New York. It will stay happily in ORB. So, did I get your undies in a twist yet? No? Darn. Guess I'll have to heat things up a bit in …..

**Chapter 9 – Big Apple Heartbreak

* * *

**

_This can't be home, anymore_

"Rise and shine, citizens of ORB! It's MOOOOOOOOOONNNNDAYYY! Time to get out of bed, start off our day, and move on with life! What'cha waiting for? Rise and shine and get your butt moving!"

_This can't be home, anymore_

Picking his head up from his pillow and feeling his mattress gone damp, Athrun formed a fist with his hand and smashed the "Off" button on his radio alarm clock.

_If you think I have not been missing the way she breathes_

Walking towards his closet, he picked out a new set of clothes for the new day, no matter how much he wished to fall back asleep, lulled by his pleasant imaginings with his Cagalli.

* * *

_You are mistaken my friend, I'm falling down_

Feeling a slight nudge on his elbow, his eyelids finally opened up, welcoming in the bright rays of the morning sun and…a pair of golden eyes?

"Cagalli? I thought you were supposed to be at the office by now?" he asked groggily, rubbing his head.

"It's Monday morning and I decided to do us a favor and call the week off. We need to plan our wedding, Kai. It's two days from now!"

Jumping off the bed with a sudden jolt of energy, Kai put some clothes on and rushed to happily pick up his wife-to-be. "That's right! Two more days and we can finally be married! Cagalli, are you as psyched as I am?"

_So put your mouth on my bloody knees_

Laughing happily with her fiancé holding her in his strong arms, she yelled back, "Of course I'm psyched, Kai! I love you! Now let me down so I can put some clothes on!"

Blushing in realization of her chest area right in front of his face, he planted her down and looked away in embarrassment.

She smiled. "Get used to it, Romeo. You'll be married to me soon. Besides, it's nothing you haven't seen before," she said dryly as she bent down to pick up her shirt.

Chuckling softly, he put on some pants as well and made his way for the door. "You're right. Well, I bet I can beat you down stairs for breakfast!"

Rushing towards him, she cried, "Don't flatter yourself!"

* * *

_One night with me and I've broken your trust_

Picking up the morning paper by his door, he quickly closed his door as he read the news headlines. "Princess of ORB to Marry Fellow Representative in Two Days!" and under the headline was a shot of the two in each other's arms, looking very happy. She looked happier than she ever did when she was with him.

_I hate to be the bond you know that's gonna bust_

In disgust, he threw the paper out his window, not caring if he violated any littering laws. Holding his coffee cup in his hand, he blew at it hoping it would cool down, just like his temper should.

_Hurting lungs breathing sighs of disgust_

But that was all okay. Today, Kira would help him take back what was his. Today, Cagalli would call off that wedding and accept his feelings for her, as well as tell him she feels the same way. Taking a sip from his mug, he smiled as he licked his lips at the mere thought of having her once more in his arms. Desperate as he was, he couldn't live a day without her.

Taking back his jacket resting on the couch all night, he made way for her home one last time.

* * *

_This can't be home, anymore_

Sure enough, it was a close race and neither wished to admit defeat. "Come, Cagalli! Admit it! I beat you here!" Kai insisted, pouring them a cup of coffee for an early morning start.

"Don't count on it, Kai. I won, end of story." As he came by with her cup, she made a grab for it, but he quickly pulled it up above her reach. "Look, I suggest you give me my cup or no anything tonight."

_This can't be home, anymore_

He grinned. "I can live with one night."

"Fine, it's been raised to your whole life and no wedding if that's how you want to play," she threatened.

She gave him the "pout"; that infamous pout that made him crack like a baby. Growling, he placed the cup in front of her. "Fine, I give, I give, just promise you still love me."

"Duh!" she said, with a kiss at the end of her bargain.

_Now cold, concrete blank walls staring into your lonely eyes_

Once the voice of two baby boys came into range, the kissing stopped and the two sat quietly reading the paper and preparing the remainder of the breakfast for the rest of them.

Kira came into the room, his morning bed hair raging wildly as he stretched up and yawned.

"Morning, Kira. Did you and Lacus have fun last night?" Cagalli asked, a teasing tone in her voice as she lowered the paper to view her brother's disheveled appearance.

_I duck behind them and hope that you won't go_

Kira smiled and shook his head. "No, Cagalli. Not when children are present in the room."

"Well, now that's not fair. You barged in on us last night, didn't you, Yamato?" Kai asked, placing Kira's cup before him.

"Oh, lay off."

Cagalli and Kai laughed together as they all took in the pleasure of Kira's mortification. Kira couldn't help but smile and laugh as well at his own misfortunes. She was smiling, and that was all it mattered. To her, it's like yesterday never happened.

_And ask for answers to why I made you cry_

Finally, he was at her doorstep. Taking in a deep breath, he dared to push her doorbell.

_I never wanted us to fade out_

Kira picked his head up, his smile suddenly turning upside down. "Who could that be?" He switched his glances from the door to the two confused people before him. Standing up, he walked to the door and slowly turned the knob.

_Resting on a love that fell apart_

He held his breath. Surely now she could talk to him. I mean, she was opening the door. His palms grew sweaty in anticipation as the door opened wider and wider…

_Where are you?_

As her swung the door open, already his day grew sour at the sight of his face. His once calm and collected nature cracked and he felt the seed in his heart crack. "YOU!"

_I need you_

Running down the steps, Lacus rushed over to her husband to stop him from his senseless onslaught. "Kira! NO!"

_You still have, still have my heart_

With a concerned look on his face, Kai motioned Cagalli to stay put as he went to investigate.

Of course, Cagalli had to disagree and stand up after he was gone from sight. Geez, after being engaged for four years, you'd think you'd know a guy.

_I never wanted us to fade out_

"YOU! How dare you show your face around here!"

He screamed in complete frustration and started smacking the boy without mercy. He continued until he felt two arms restraining him back. Turning around, his fierce lavender eyes meet a pair of fierce blue ones. "KAI! Let me go!"

_Resting on a love that fell apart, torn apart_

His whole body was hurting as the blue haired coordinator struggled to stand up. Feeling a support on his back, he faced up to find Lacus Clyne helping him. "Lacus? Where's Cagalli? And…and how did Kira find out? Did she tell him?"

_Where are you?_

She smiled a sad smile as she hitched him up into a semi-sitting position. "No, Athrun…she never said a word."

_I need you  
_

"GET OFF ME, KAI!" Kira screamed in anger, trying to break free from the boys grip.

"No, Kira! Not until you've calm down! What's your problem?"

Growling loudly, he pushed the boy away, and huffing in his struggle, he turned to face the boy who hurt his sister beyond reason. "Him…"

_You still have, still have my heart_

"Kira, please!" Athrun begged, pushing Lacus aside as he stood. "Let me talk to her!"

Kai sat in confusion, staring back and forth between the two. "_Her_?"

_One night with me and I've broken your trust_

"I have to say I'm sorry! She has to know how I feel! She has to--"

But he was cut off. Kira ran up to him and nailed a punch dead on his stomach. Bending down to avoid the blood gushing out his mouth, Kira kicked the boy on his side, watching him roll pitifully on the ground, groaning in pain.

_I hate to be the bond you know that's gonna bust  
_

"Kira, please stop!" Lacus begged from the sidelines.

Her voice fell into a void as Kira lifted his leg for one final kick.

_Hurting lungs breathing sighs of disgust_

"KIRA, STOP!"

He turned to face the direction of the voice. Cagalli….she was watching all this at the safety of her doorway. She walked over to Kai and helped him stand up. Then, she pushed him aside to face Athrun, once more.

_This can't be home, anymore_

He smiled weakly, a trail of blood streaming down the edge of his lip. She was still willing to talk to him.

_This can't be home, anymore_

She was still willing to love him, but…

_Open up my heart_

SMACK!

She slapped him across his face, forcing him to step back. A confused look fell on his features as he stared at her for an explanation.

_Open up my heart_

"Didn't I tell you to never show your face to me, ever again?"

His hand on his cheek to soothe the pain, he just continued to stare.

Her face grew furious. "Didn't I!"

He stepped back in fear of another smack on the cheek. "…yes…"

_Open up my heart_

Her eyes began to tear as she caught sight of the blood seeping through his fingers resting on his smacked cheek. Damn long fingernails. "Then just…leave me alone…"

He stared as she walked away to help Kai up. He stared as Kira gave him a deadly glare. He stared as Lacus just ignored him. He just stood and stared.

As she waited for all three people to enter her door, she turned one last time to face him, tears rolling down her eyes. "Just leave us all alone…." And with that, she closed the door.

_Open up my heart

* * *

_

I suck at brawl scenes. Anywho, such beautiful hatred! Gah, I'm not proud of Athrun as of now in Destiny, so I'm doing all this in frustration. Well, good news is, Cagalli is finally doing something useful with her Strike Rouge! I squeeled! Yes, like any Cagalli fangurl, lol. I can't wait to see her come back in full gear action! I miss the old Cags! BRING HER BACK! She better frucking start kicking ass again, hopefully add that IWSP pack on Strike Rouge at that, and maybe bring back Kisaka and Kusinagi! W00t! And with the ORB soldiers on the AA, she can totally rock! Yes! Please make it happen, FUKUDA! Make me happy!

Sorry, spur of the moment feeling. Um, so please REVIEW AND BE HEARD!


	10. Best I Ever Had

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

I don't own the song "Best I Ever Had". It's owned by the uber kewl, and a must listen to band called Vertical Horizon, and of course their people.

Hmm, I still have no idea what to do with this thing. Gah, I want it to end happy, but there are so many possibilities! Man, this is fun hearing you guys talk. Trust me, I take your opinions to heart….I just don't pay attention sometimes when I write. LoL.

Hmm…oh well, onto….

**Chapter 10 – Best I Ever Had

* * *

**

_So you sailed away_

Life, right about now, was the biggest piece of shit God granted him. He could only swear everyone and everything was born to hate him, despise him, torture him. Nothing in this world was made for him.

Cagalli was no exception.

_Into a grey sky morning _

Why couldn't one happy thing ever occur in his life? Why was everything and everyone around him against the very thing he stood for? To hell with that. He didn't even know.

He just couldn't understand why things were just the way they were and so, he cried and cried on his bedside with no ray of hope shining anywhere near his window.

_Now I'm here to stay_

As Lacus helped Cagalli get herself together in the room next door, Kira and Kai sat in silence until Kai picked up the courage to talk.

"Kira…? What…what was that all about? I mean, you seemed pretty…upset. Do you need to tell me anything?"

_Love can be so boring_

Kira sighed and looked out the window. "Kai…you just can't understand what a brother feels for his sister…He broke that connection, Kai…he broke it…"

Kai sat in mindless confusion. Kira was talking in riddles to him and he couldn't figure heads or tails about it.

_Nothing's quite the same now_

"Lacus, I don't understand why he won't just leave me alone!" Cagalli cried into her hands as Lacus looked on with sympathy.

Rubbing her back to ease her heavy hearted pain, "Cagalli…please. Your wedding is in two days. Get a hold of yourself! Don't think about him for now. Think about the moments of happiness you'll be sharing with Kai in the near future! Think of what great opportunities you can set up for ORB through this marriage! Cagalli, you have been slacking off with your planning. I suggest you get dressed and go out with Kai to start the preparations."

Looking up with puffy, red eyes, she let out a sniffle and wiped up her remaining tears. "It's just too hard Lacus…but, for you, I guess I can be happy for one day." She forced a smile on as she strained to hold back tears, getting up and leaving the room to call Kai to get ready.

_I just say your name now_

Lacus took in a deep breath as she stood to meet Kira in the kitchen.

Good. He was alone.

_But it's not so bad_

"Kira?"

He didn't take his eyes away from the window.

"What you did back there….it went way out of hand."

He continued to stare until he finally opened his mouth to reply. "Lacus…tell me. Have you ever felt what your sister or anyone really close to you has felt? Can you tell if they're feeling sad, happy, mad, or whatever?"

Nodding, she replied simply with a "Yes."

_You're only the best I've ever had_

"Then if you can feel their emotions, how can you say that if my sister was hurt because of him, how can you say that what I did went way out of hand?" He turned to face her, but his expression was soft. "Lacus, I was trying to look out for Cagalli."

Lacus stared at her feet in contemplation. "Cagalli doesn't need looking out for…not now anyway. She's perfectly capable of taking care of herself. What he did, maybe she wanted it to happen…because maybe, just maybe she still might…love him." She turned to face his lost expression as she took a sip from her cup. "Kira, you're a great brother, but there are some times you just butt your head in and make things worse than they already are. She can deal with this herself, Kira. Do her a favor and stay out of it."

_You don't want me back_

As Lacus began stepping foot outside the kitchen, Kira called her off.

"Lacus…I wish it were as easy as you say. But for you, I'll do my best."

She smiled. By the look of his eyes, he did mean it, and he never broke a promise. Walking over to him, she patted his head jokingly as a master his dog. "Good boy, Kira! You get a treat tonight! But first…I have to go and pick out the bride's maids' outfits. Do you want to come along and take the children?"

He shook his head politely. "It's alright, Lacus. I've got enough to think about."

"Suit yourself." Giving him a small peck on his cheek, she made her exit.

"She still might love him?" he thought silently to himself as he stared once more outside that window.

* * *

_You're just the best I ever had_

She knew that once she left that doorway, she'd be walking in hell. Kai stayed silent, not wishing to upset her with this morning and kept the discussion strictly on their marriage preparation. "So we have this meeting with Linda, our wedding planner I hired. She said she'll go step-by-step with us on every single decoration, the songs, the after party. She also wants to- - "

_So you stole my world  
_

She tuned him out. Planning never was something she was good at anyway. What Kira did…he found out. Lacus must've known, too. Kai probably didn't even know a thing. That explained how he acted. Or else he would've been like Kira…or worse.

But why did she have to care so much? Why couldn't she just throw him away like all the others?

Oh yeah, because he was different. He was Athrun Zala.

_Now I'm just a phony_

"Cagalli? Honey, we're here," Kai indicated, poking her shoulder playfully to catch her attention.

With a blink or two, she woke up from her musings and stepped off the car. "Sorry, daydreaming again."

"What else is new? There's no difference with you at work and at home," he teased.

"Oh shut up," she said, pushing him forward a little faster into the building before them. "I just want to get this over with so we can get to our wedding in one piece, Kai."

"Okay, okay! Don't get your thongs in a twist!"

* * *

_Remembering the girl_

Lacus _was_ on her way to get dresses. She _was_ going to help Kai out by doing something Cagalli wished she never was given the responsibility to do. But, she decided to change her mind when she passed by a familiar friend's apartment.

She decided to take a chance with their love and play match-maker. She decided to help Athrun and Cagalli.

_Leaves me down and lonely_

She wasn't 100 sure, but she had a feeling that there was some place in her heart that still yearned for the man to complete her. It was a gamble she was willing to take.

_Send it in a letter_

One deep breath, and the pivotal moment in their lives would suddenly start.

"Lacus?"

_Make yourself feel better_

He was a wreck. Dried blood stains all over his clothes indicated he never bothered to change once he got home. Tear stains marked his face from eye to cheek. He just was a wreck without her, and this justified it in less than 5 seconds of examining him.

"What are you doing here?"

_But it's not so bad_

She smiled her usual, uplifting smile that brought joy into any broken heart. But with an exception to his right now. "Athrun, do you still love her?"

_You're only the best I ever had_

His puffy eyes blinked and he sniffed. "Cagalli?...I want to…but she doesn't…I can't love her like this anymore, Lacus. It only hurts. Besides, she's got Kai. He looks like a good enough guy. He can take care of her…"

_You don't need me back_

Her sweet face soured at his reply. "You can't possibly mean that!"

He glared at her. "Of course I do, Lacus! Don't tell me how to feel! If she can't love me, I can't love her! That's the end of my story!"

_You're just the best I ever had_

"But Athrun…she does love you."

"Shut up. If she loves me, she would've given me a second chance. If she loves me, she wouldn't be marrying Kai. If she loves me…SHE'D BE WITH ME!"

He backed off when it was her turn to glare back. He'd never seen her like this before. It was definitely a character change in a sweet girl like Lacus Clyne. "She loves you, Athrun. She's just really confused right now. I'm not totally sure, but I do have a feeling she still does. Otherwise, why do you think she agreed to do it with you yesterday night? Why didn't she call us and tell us what happened? Why didn't she just make you understand right then and there that she wanted to move on? Because, Athrun, she still cares!"

_And it may take some time to_

He stared at the pink haired pop star before him and just couldn't bring himself to be convinced. "Lacus…"

_Patch me up inside_

"Athrun, you still have a chance…you can make this work."

_But I can't take it so I_

She gave him one last look before turning around to leave. He was a wreck. He was Cagalli's wreck. "If you're still willing to try…don't try too hard. You'll just hurt yourself more."

* * *

_Run away and hide_

"…the roses will be mounted as the center piece of each table. Pink and white was your color choice, correct? Well, once the guests are seated, our appetizers will be delivered ASAP so they won't get restless. Of course, the main course is the finest in ORB and your wedding cake will be - - "

_And I may find in time that_

Linda went on and on about the wedding preparations. She was very optimistic and practically born for the job. ORB's finest, for sure.

_You were always right_

She glanced over at Kai, who was mesmerized by the whole idea, the colors, the food, the everything. He was stuck in a trance that he simply didn't wish to get out of.

She smiled. He was _this_ stoked for that wedding.

_You're always right_

"Linda?"

The young lady stopped her little description and whatnot, looking at Cagalli in surprise. This was the first time she had heard her voice the whole day. It was just Kai and her talking.

"Yes?"

_So you sailed away_

"May I look around a bit? I just want to get a better feel of the place."

With a quick nod, Linda brushed her away and went on with her planning non sense to Kai.

_Into a grey sky morning_

Letting out a sigh of relief, partly to finally get away from Linda, she made way to the table she would be sitting. Taking her place at the table, she looked before to find several more tables spread around, facing her. Of course, everyone would be there to cheer her on, but lacking one very important person. Her father. He wouldn't be able to see his daughter wed, but he'd be watching it front row up where he was.

_Now I'm here to stay_

He sat on his chair and pondered over her words.

"_But Athrun…she does love you."_

Does she really?

He couldn't figure out why Lacus was so convincing, but whatever it was. It made him think for hours. "I want to love you…"

_Love can be so boring_

"…But I have to let you go…"

_What was it you wanted?_

"…I don't want to hurt you anymore…"

_Could it be I'm haunted?_

"I just want you to be happy…"

_But it's not so bad_

She scanned the tables again. There was one less chair missing at one table.

_You're only the best I ever had_

She grabbed the guest list crumpled in her pocket and viewed it over. Smack dab in the middle was a big black scratch out.

_I don't want you back_

Squinting really hard, bringing it against the light, she sought out the name she scratched.

Finally, it came to her.

Athrun Zala.

_You're just the best I ever had_

This was already an old copy, torn and wrinkled beyond its years, and she already made sure that only the most important people would come…

_The best I ever had_

…meaning he was most definitely not coming.

"I won't let you ruin this for me, Athrun…no matter how I feel…"

But she had a feeling she'd regret it otherwise. Taking out another, and this time not crumpled, piece of paper, she clicked the top of her pen and started writing.

"Really, if it doesn't show, I still want you here. But, I guess I really should start out by saying I'm sorry…"

_The best I ever…

* * *

_

GOD! I love that song! Once more, I blame that cursed radio for this. First I was planning for Athrun to become suicidal or something in this. Kai was gonna find out about Athrun and Cagalli and just keep quite about it…BUT IT NEVER HAPPENED! I thank everyone who tried to help picking a song out for me, but I'm sorry I didn't use them. BSB is just not my fandom. They don't really rock in my books. Sorry. LoL. I'll never stoop down to that level. Anywho, so I really wasn't going to use Lacus or Kira much. But what one song can do to ya over the course of one play, right? MIRACLES HAPPEN! Man, I wasn't even expecting this. Only God knows what'll happen next.

So, Lacus decides to play heroine again. Athrun lets Cagalli go. gets stoned PLEASE DON'T STOP READING! I will not let you AsuCaga fans down! This is a happy ending! And Cagalli…what's she doing! xD

Yes, a happy ending on life support. Please, be heard! REVIEW!


	11. Goodbye to You

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

I really don't own the song "Goodbye to You". The musical genius behind this song is Michelle Branch, and her little people.

Aki: So….what will Cagalli do? God, this is so sad….the song I mean. Anywho, the reason why I even put up a note was to tell ya'll that I'm speeding up the story to only hours before the wedding. This chapter is Cagalli centric.

**Chapter 11 – Goodbye to You

* * *

**

_Of all the things I believed in_

She watched as several cars pulled up her driveway to greet the groom and other family members before the big day. It was bad luck for the groom to meet with his bride before they wed, but others didn't want to take a chance. They didn't want a repeat of the past.

_I just want to get it over with_

She smiled. It was her big day, for real this time. For the past two days, she had been literally relieved of her position as Head Representative of ORB so she could concentrate on her wedding day with Kai.

_Tears form behind my eyes,_

And she worked her ass to the max. This was her day, and for once, she actually had a say in it this time. She actually wanted to get married to this guy.

And she wasn't going to let anyone stop her from doing so.

_But I do not cry counting the days that pass me by_

She jumped on her bed, grabbing her pillow in the process, and locking it into a tight hug.

Her door opened slightly, a creak allowing one eye to spy through.

_I've been searching deep down in my soul_

"CAGALLI!"

The loud yell almost made the girl fall from her bed in revelation. She picked her head up and looked at the doorway to find a very unpleased Lacus Clyne.

She was already clothed in her bride's maid's outfit and she looked absolutely stunning, she just really needed to lose the unpleasant aura around her.

_Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old_

"Lacus, what are you doing here?"

_It feels like I'm starting all over again_

The pop star made her way to the fallen princess and helped her off the bed and standing on the floor. "Cagalli, your wedding is in less than an hour and you're still not dressed!"

_The last three years were just pretend_

"Oh come on, Lacus. I've pulled off worse things, I can pull off a wedding," Cagalli replied coolly, sitting herself back on the bed, holding her pillow once more.

_And I said goodbye to you_

Lacus wouldn't take it. Her inner mother was emerging uncontrollably, forcing Cagalli up and into the bathroom to put on her wedding dress.

"Cagalli! Do try not to make an idiot out of yourself! You're my sister-in-law now for two years! You helped me back then, now I have to repay you, and you're not making it any easier for me!"

_Goodbye to everything I thought I knew_

Cagalli clearly remembered that distant memory. Lacus was a mess, running around and about, making sure everything was _perfect_. Cagalli had to practically restrain the girl with belts and whatnot to calm her down so she could put on her make up.

"Oh fine. But this is just pay back, Lacus."

_You were the one I loved,_

Kira sat nervously on the stair steps, his foot tapping restlessly on the floor. He was more nervous than the bride! Natural, I guess. He was her brother. Kai had already been brought to the chapel. He was cooler, more calm than Kira ever was.

How he envied him.

_The one thing I tried to hold on to_

He checked his watch for the record of 27 times today. 11:09.

"Come on, Cagalli! What's holding you up?"

_I still get lost in your eyes_

"Oh shut up! I'm coming!"

A sudden jolt forced his legs up, standing to face the top of the staircase.

_And it seems that I can't live a day without you_

His eyes widened in disbelief. Seeing his sister in a dress was a very, very rare occasion. And every time she ever decided to wear a dress, she looked simply beautiful each time.

_And it seems I can't live a day without you_

He examined every part of her as she descended from the steps. White also seemed to make her glow, for once her make-up wasn't so thick, and her high heels were driving her so insane that she…fell?

Once Kira's senses snapped back into action, he stepped forward to catch his sister in his arms in a bridal position.

"Thanks."

He smiled at her softly and ran her body into the car, Lacus following quickly behind them.

_Closing my eyes and you chase my thoughts away_

Settling the wife-to-be in the back seat, he smiled as he shut the door in her face.

Fuming like crazy, she screamed up to the driver's seat, "Kira! What the hell!"

He started the engine as soon as he escorted Lacus into the passenger's seat. "You're late, Athha. Don't tell me 'What the hell.'"

_To a place where I am blinded by the light_

Her eager smile turned upside down as she slumped in her seat, her arms crossed on her chest.

Lacus smiled and looked back at the seething blonde. "Don't mind him, Cagalli. He's just nervous for you. He just doesn't want a repeat of last time."

_But it's not right_

Cagalli blinked and stared stupidly at the pop star then switched her glances out the window.

No more repeats…

_Goodbye to you_

She just wanted to know if he got it in time. Then she'd be as nervous as her brother. But ever since that moment in time, she hadn't heard from him.

_Goodbye to everything I thought I knew_

She wondered if he would even show, especially after everything she'd done to him.

_You were the one I loved_

Shaking her head furiously as the church came into view, she picked up her character, and waited for her brother to assist her from out of the car.

_The one thing that I tried to hold on to_

He gave her a big smile as she took hold of his hand and walked inside the chapel. Her heart was racing now, her hands becoming sweaty underneath her silk gloves, and her feet shaking more than usual in their heels.

Why?

It's show time.

_And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time_

She continued walking with the company of her brother, but he stopped halfway to bid his sweetheart farewell.

"I'll meet you at the altar, Lacus," he said with a gentle kiss on her cheek.

She smiled and the pink-haired songstress walked ahead.

_I want what's yours and I want what's mine_

The two walked together in silence for a little while, and her heart kept beating in nervous expectation. It was killing her like crazy.

_I want you but I'm not giving in this time_

There goes his sibling senses again.

Kira turned to his sister, arms locked, and smiled warmly. "Are you nervous, Cagalli?"

_Goodbye to you_

She avoided all means of eye contact with him. Look at him would only make her worry more. "Yeah…"

_Goodbye to everything I thought I knew_

"Well," his arm locked with hers moved to her back, rubbing it to soothe her doubts away. "It's always like that. Remember me? I was going to have a nervous breakdown because I couldn't find my sock!"

_You were the one I loved_

At this, she laughed, and he couldn't help but feel proud to be her brother. "Yeah, you were insane. I can't believe _big_ sis had to figure out that that missing sock of yours was in your back pocket."

_The one thing that I tried to hold on to_

"Yeah, _little sister_,you were such a great help on my wedding day," he said sarcastically, stopping before the final set of doors before the moment of truth.

_The one thing that I tried to hold on to_

She frowned at his remark. "Little sister? Since when? I was always the older one!" she yelled, balling up her fist and shaking it dangerously in his face.

_The one thing that I tried to hold on to_

He backed away nervously, his hands in the air in surrender. "Alright, alright! You're older! But come on…you ready?"

_The one thing that I tried to hold on to_

Calming down with deep breaths, she drew back her fist and faced the doors before her.

"As ready as I'll ever be."

_The one thing that I tried to hold on to_

Behind the doors, the two siblings could distinctly hear the wedding march play and that was her signal. Taking back his arm and locking hers with his, she allowed him to open the final set of doors and a boom of reality hit her straight in the head as she was open to the site before her. It was all beautiful and she hated to admit it, but that blabber mouth, Linda, actually did a great job.

Just seeing it made her feel alive again. No more sweaty palms, no more shaky legs, and no more racing hearts. It was just her and Kai from here on, and she couldn't help but feel "stoked".

_And when the stars fall I will lie awake,_

But even in the extravagant celebration, she felt something was…missing. She couldn't exactly point out what, but there was something…

Deciding the problem was within the crowd of people gathered inside the compact building, she scanned around at the many faces she saw.

Murrue and Andy. Yzak, Shiho, Dearka, and Miriallia. Mr. and Mrs. Yamato. Hell, even Kisaka made an appearance. Everyone was here, but still…

Wanting to frown at the fact that the missing link was still in fact, missing, she swat the idea away and kept all smiles as she was led to her beloved, Kai. He looked incredibly handsome, standing up there in the altar, waiting to receive her hand in marriage. It was all to perfect…wait, almost perfect.

Just one thing was missing…and she couldn't figure out what…

_You're my shooting star

* * *

_

What oh what is that missing link?

Well? I tried to lighten this chapter up. Things will indeed darken when it becomes Kai's point of view later on in the story…OMG! I can't talk right now! My mom just gave birth to my little sis! I'm so friggin happy! Can't talk, but you can! Make yourself heard! REVIEW!


	12. Perfect World

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

Damn! I need to think of a last name for Kai…shit…hmm..TAKAHASHI!

JC-Titans143 – I looked at your stories and I couldn't find a last name for Mr. Kai, so I hope you're ok with me using Takahashi as is last name.

I don't own the song "Perfect World." It's owned by, once again, Simple Plan and their people.

Aki-chan: So…since the last chapter was from mostly a Cagalli POV, now it's time for her coughHUBBY-TO-BE-IN-THE-NEAR-FUTUREcough ex to have his turn. Yup, it's time for Athrun Zala to speak his mind. So…HERE'S:

**Chapter 12 – Perfect World

* * *

**

"_Really, if it doesn't show, I still want you here. But, I guess I really should start out by saying I'm sorry. How many times have I hurt you in less than two days? How can I say I'm sorry without having to say it in your face and end up doing what we did before? I guess what I'm trying to say is, I guess I really am sorry. You know just as well as Kira and Lacus that I was never good at apologizing, so I'll just get straight to the point. My wedding is in two days and I would appreciate it if you would come. This is a personal invitation, Athrun. Please take my whole-hearted apology and please come. I would appreciate it._

_Sincerely_

_Love,_

_Cagalli _

_I never could have seen these far_

He looked at the letter, long and hard, sitting in his lonesome at home. The first thing that caught his eye? A crossed out "Sincerely" and a "Love Cagalli" following it.

_I never could've seen this coming_

"_**But Athrun…she does love you."**_

"_**Because, Athrun, she still cares!"**_

"_**Athrun, you still have a chance…you can make this work."**_

"Maybe you were right after all," he thought quietly. "It's just a shame I let her go, Lacus."

_It seems like my world's falling apart_

He crumpled the letter up and threw it outside the window, landing perfectly into the garbage can below. Standing up, he walked over to a mirror near his entrance door.

_Why is everything so hard?_

Falling into deep contradiction with his look, he frowned as he scrutinized himself in the mirror, constantly fiddling with his tie in displeasure.

_I don't think that I can deal with the things you said_

"_**She loves you, Athrun."**_

"_**We can start over."**_

Words, words, words. Why was he hearing all these words? All these hateful, deceitful, reprehensible words! Why were they ringing inside?

_It just won't go away_

Shaking the mindless thoughts away, he caught one last glimpse at himself in the mirror. As perfect as a wreck could be.

_In a perfect world this could never happen_

Simply pleased with himself, he walked out his doorway, dressed to impress, walking to a certain event.

"_**Really, if it doesn't show, I still want you here."**_

"**_Please take my whole-hearted apology and please come."_**

_**Love,**_

_**Cagalli **_

_In a perfect world you'd still be here_

The streets were empty and every big screen atop every building had live coverage of the event of the day. It almost became annoying, but I guess it's the price you pay for being who you are.

_And it makes no sense_

Well, let's change that to "Who _they _are."

The uniting of two royal family members. Tell me what else could be more perfect?

_I could just pick up the pieces but to you,_

How's about uniting two people who are actually in love? No, not that "I love you because you know what I want" kind of love. The_ real_ love. The love you couldn't earn with money, materials, and other human pleasures. The thing that sparked when you knew it was the one.

He still felt that way, but today, she made it clear she didn't and never to begin with.

_This means nothing at all_

Of course, he didn't have a problem with it. He let her go just like she let him. A never-ending cycle of favors to make the world a better place. To make a perfect world.

_I used to think that I was strong_

A horde of children, boys being the majority, ran past his leisurely figure, towards his destination as well.

The wedding chapel.

_Until the day it all went wrong_

In the past, where he took the liberty to work as her personal bodyguard, they often joked around here and there about their future. They chatted on and on about getting married in that damned chapel, invite a few friends for an after party at the mansion, both in PLANT and in ORB, have a nice honeymoon away from it all, and hell, throw in a few kids and you had a plan!

_I think I need a miracle to make it through_

But of course, it never happened. And it would never, ever happen to their dismay.

_I wish that I could bring you back_

It hurt, yeah. But what could they do? Fate was a bitch, just like the rest of them.

_I wish that I could turn back time_

And he wasn't going to stop Fate's plan. He was always like that of course, until come lucky idiot could get it through his thick skull that he was wrong.

But now he didn't have a lucky idiot. He, himself, was just that. An idiot.

'_Cuz I can't let go, I just can't find my way_

Looking up from the cold, hard pavement and his super-shined shoes, he found himself in front of the closed doors of the chapel.

_Without you I just can't find my way_

The humongous crowd was gone and everything around him was silent.

It was beginning.

_In a perfect world, this could never happen_

Taking in a deep breath, he closed in on the door, his hand slightly trembling on the knob, the one thing separating him from the biggest fear of his life.

_In a perfect world, you'd still be here_

In one quick turn, he stepped inside the door and realized he stepped into the balcony of the church.

Perfect view.

_And it makes no sense_

He saw her, shining in all her wonder. But with his height, he could barely see her smile underneath her translucent veil.

He gripped onto the railing as he heard the priest begin his little talk about the kind of stuff no one listens to.

_I can just pick up the pieces but to you,_

She scanned the interior once more for that missing link. God, too many people…such little, precious time.

Sighing, she turned to face Kai and smiled at him as his warm atmosphere brought her once more into a state of tranquility.

_This means nothing at all_

_I don't know what I should do now_

He gripped the railing until he felt his fingernails cut deep inside the wood. How he wished it were him down there. How he wished he had followed Lacus' advice. How he wish he had never made that decision.

_I don't know where I should go_

But he did know that he still loved her. He did know that he did his best to win her back, but failed miserably.

_I'm still here waiting for you_

But that's okay. She wouldn't have gained much being with him anyway. Alex Dino? The bodyguard? What was a princess doing with a bodyguard to begin with?

_I'm lost when you're not around_

Suddenly, he picked his head up in realization and finally figured it out. He figured it all out. He finally knew why he left her those years back.

_I need to hold on to you_

"It took me four years, Cagalli, four very long years…but I finally know why."

_I just can't let you go_

"Because I was insecure…because I knew I wasn't good enough as Alex Dino. Athrun Zala was more than enough for you…but I was too insecure to figure it out…"

_In a perfect world, this could never happen_

Tears formed behind his eyes as the moment of truth finally came to reality.

* * *

"Do you, Kai Takahashi, take Cagalli Yula Athha as your lawfully wedded wife, for richer or poor, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?"

_In a perfect world, you'd still be here_

Kai smiled lovingly into her glassy amber eyes and held her hand firmly in his own. "I do."

_And it makes no sense_

"Do you, Cagalli Yula Athha, take Kai Takahashi, as your lawfully wedded husband, for richer or poor, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?"

_I can just pick up the pieces but to you,_

She made one last scan of the building, the tears in her eyes blurring her view. Even with defective vision, she could clearly see that that missing link would stay a missing link.

_This means nothing at all_

"I do."

_Nothing at all_

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride."

Athrun turned quickly on his heels and went to exit the church. "She's happy, what more can I want?"

_You feel nothing at all_

Kai smiled as he set her veil behind her, cupping her face in his hands, his thumbs wiping away her tears, he bent forward for a gentle kiss on her lips.

Cagalli, teary eyed still, looked up at her new husband and smiled. "We did it."

_Nothing at all

* * *

_

So there's the wedding!

Anywho, thanks for the congrats everyone! She came out great, but she'll be staying in the hospital while big sis has to graduate. --

Anywho, hmm, should I just cut the crap and move on with AsuCaga remorse? Or should I drag it on further with a torturous KaiCaga romance? FWAHAHA!

I don't know what to do. But gahh!

I can't help it anymore. I'm itching to write another lemon, I don't frocking care who, I just wanna write a new one! Why! Cuz I thought my other one sucked. xD

BE HEARD! SPEAK A WURD! REVIEW!

Btw, there's an estimated six more chapters left in this story.


	13. Picture

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

I don't own the totally BEAUTIFUL song, "Picture". It's happily owned by Kid Rock and his accomplice, Sheryl Crow, and their little people who are underpaid. XD

Despite the first couple of lyrics, Athrun has not become a pimp. Sorry, it's just how the song goes. Everything else just flows with my ideas with the chapter.

Aki-chan: Let's get this straight. Here comes a BIG BIG BIG time jump. Fast forward the current storyline to 2 years in the future. So, that means everyone is now 24. Yup, they're old. XD

There is a mad reason for this though…and trust me. This is the biggest turning point in the story. This is where things finally move away from KaiCaga to AsuCaga. YOU HAPPY NOW!

Anywho, one last note. Thanks for the congrats, ya'll! I ended up being the stinkin' valedictorian of the class of '05. I funny, since I'm the biggest slacker in the whole school. xD…oh, btw, lil sis is doing great thanks to ya'll.

Finally, steshin, don't get ur panties in a twist, there's another "Bonus" AsuCaga scene for ya. It's gonna be posted on my LJ if anyone's interested. I know u r, ste. XD…onto…

**Chapter 13 – Picture

* * *

**

Ever since that fateful day she married him, ORB seemed to be at the height of its power. During their rule, ORB was the most peaceful it had ever been in years. The country was prosperous and nothing could stop it from being so ideal. No wars, that was good news enough. No conspiracy, no hatred, no nothing. Just peace, sweet love, all the beautiful things.

Kira and Lacus were living peacefully in their new home, no longer depending on Cagalli for a roof over their heads. In addition to the two two-year-old boys, they had a little girl on the way.

Miriallia and Dearka and Yzak and Shiho had gotten married together just last year and were now currently living up in the PLANTs. Yzak and Shiho were still quarrelling over stupid little things and Dearka and Miriallia…well, they were expecting a set of twins.

Life was beautiful.

_Living my life in a slow hell_

At least for them. To say the least, his life was no where near as perfect. Still living in his apartment, still living alone, still heartbroken beyond repair. Yeah, I would call that pretty crappy, wouldn't you?

_Different girl every night at the hotel_

No. He never bothered to find another play thing, not that he considered his first love a "toy". He couldn't force himself to love again. He just wouldn't allow it. He loved one person and no one else, even if she didn't love him back and married some guy that wasn't him.

_I ain't seen the sunshine in three damn days_

Despite living in his lonesome, he didn't bother calling Yzak or Dearka, or anyone else for the matter. He just wanted to be alone. He ignored several phone calls from his friend, and struggled even harder to ignore the life-threatening messages left in his answering machine left mostly by Yzak.

_Been fueling up on cocaine and whiskey _

He couldn't bring himself to watch the news anymore. It just showed _her_ being happy with _him_.

_Wish I had a good girl to miss me_

Never watched movies, read novels, anything. Everything simply reminded him of the pain that broke his heart two years back.

_Lord, I wonder if I'll ever change my ways_

He hardly ate, rarely left the sanctity of his bed and covers. His eyes haven't seen the light of day for, hmm, let's say about 2 weeks tops?

_I put your picture away_

But he did manage to do two things.

One. Stayed alive to continue wallowing in his misery. He was never totally dismal enough to take his own life. Even he knew it was stupid.

Maybe he wanted to stay alive. It was a funny thought. Curling up underneath his bed covers, he let out a faint laugh.

_Sat down and cried today_

For some reason, he only stayed alive just because of this funny little theory of his. He had this feeling that she'd come back to him. He had this feeling that she still felt for him, that she still might've loved him.

Funny, right?

_I can't look at you while I'm lying next to her_

Two. He still kept that picture by the living room couch. Underneath his blanket, through the dim light given off by the sun, he could see her.

He could think otherwise and go shopping for a magazine with her face on it and obsess over that, but almost every magazine and news report nowadays just showed her with that man.

_I put your picture away _

He never did tell her the direct reason why he left six years back.

_Sat down and cried today_

And until now, he still felt the same way. Insecure.

But he wanted to die in peace, even if his heart wouldn't.

He wanted to tell her why, so just in case that funny feeling was somehow right, she could feel better about herself.

_I can't look at you while I'm lying next to her_

Finally, after what seemed like years, he decided that the truth must be told. He pulled the covers off and away as he jumped out of bed and went for a quick shower, dinner, and hell knew he needed it, a walk in the park on a Saturday night just to clear some thoughts.

* * *

_I called you last night at the hotel_

What words can you use to describe the life of ORB's princess, Cagalli Yula Athha?

Perfect.

Ideal.

Wonderful.

Picture perfect.

Yup, her life was all that and much, much more.

_Everyone knows but they won't tell_

Happily married to the love of her life, Kai, together ruling a nation filled with endless possibilities, what could possibly go wrong?

_But their half-hearted smiled tell me something just ain't right_

Saturday night. After the final ball of the week, she was just about sick of hearing politics crap, wearing dresses, and walking on high heels; Taking in public, mingling with random people, and staying by the punch bowl for refuge. Yeah, times like this, she wished she weren't a politician's daughter.

_I've been waiting on you for a long time_

She slid away from his warm embrace, letting his arm slide off her waist, pulling the blanket along with her as she moved silently away. A slight snore escaped him as he dwelled on his late night dreams and she just smiled.

Even if she hated the life of a politician, she still had someone who accepted that and comforted her when she felt frustrated or let down. And that person was lying in her bed.

_Fueling up on heartaches and cheap wine_

Wrapping the blankets around her sore and naked body, she walked up to her window to stare outside at her beautiful nation.

Midnight and the streets were still very much alive, hustling and bustling below her. She finally achieved that piece her father had been dreaming of for years and she wouldn't want her life any other way.

_I ain't heard from you in three damn nights_

Smiling as she softly turned on her heels, she placed the blanket atop her husband and made way for the bathroom for a shower and a quick change of clothes.

_I put your picture away_

But there were some occasions where she fell silent during several conversations. She ended up excusing herself to go and cry this out in the closest bathroom.

He never bothered asking; it wasn't his business after all. If she needed any, he gave it to her simply. Tonight was just one of those nights.

At the mention of ZAFT, she choked up and walked away quickly.

_I wonder where you been_

She had just made peace with the PLANTs and still something about them saddened her deeply.

_I can't look at you while I'm lying next to him_

Oh yeah. That green-eyed, blue haired bastard.

Putting on some jogging pants and a tight t-shirt, she gave him a quick peck on the forehead and exited their bedroom door.

_I put your picture away_

That was the only emptiness in her life that prevented her from living it larger than life. She had sudden jolts of regret every time she was loving Kai. She had regrets for not telling him those three small words two years back.

_I wonder where you been_

It was just past one and she wanted to clear some things up.

_I can't look at you while I'm lying next to him_

An early morning jog would help her.

_I saw you yesterday with an old friend_

Once at the park, she began her jog, as early as it may be. The street lights were still on.

Passing by two late night lovers sitting on a bench, whispering who knows what into each others ear, her face scrunched and she jogged faster to get away from them.

Something about them….just reminded her of something.

_It was the same old same how've you been?_

As a memory forced its way into her head, she ran faster, closing her eyes in frustration…

…until she felt herself colliding with something else.

_Since you've been gone my world's been dark and gray_

"What the.."

Rubbing her head to soothe the minor pain that was inflicted on her, she picked herself up to apologize and yell at to the person she bumped into.

She really wished she hadn't. But a little part of her was jumping with joy.

_You reminded me of brighter days_

"Cagalli?"

"Athrun?"

Deja vu all over again.

_I hoped you were comin' home to stay_

He helped her up, staring at her like crazy. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah…fine."

"Um," he said, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "It's late out. Why are you walking around without an escort?"

She frowned. Still, he thinks she needs that much taking care of. "For your information, Athrun Zala, even a girl like me can take morning jogs without a bodyguard."

_I was headed to church_

"But still. It's late and it's a Saturday night. Do you know how many people party this time of night and go home drunk?" he asked worriedly.

_I was off to drink you away_

Frowning still, she crossed her arms and looked away.

Sighing, he tried his best to confront her after all this time. "Look, I'm just concerned for your safety."

_I thought about you for a long time_

A small blush crawled up to her cheeks and she looked at the boy curiously. Concerned?

"Tell me this then, Athrun. If you were so damn concerned about me, then why didn't you do anything for the past two years?"

_Can't seem to get you off my mind_

"Because I was insecure, Cagalli! That's why I never said anything for the past two years! That's why I left you a long time ago! That's why I never stopped you from marrying Kai when I came to your wedding! BECAUSE OF MY INSECURITIES!"

_I can't understand why we're living life this way_

As he watched her shocked expression worsen, he took in deep breaths to calm his nerve. "Look…I wise girl once told me that we could start over. But she was too much of a hypocrite to take her own damn advice."

"But…"

"No," he said, pressing his index firmly over her warm lips. "No…don't tell me otherwise, Cagalli.

"Do you remember that day when I came over to try to at least apologize to you about what I did the night before? Remember how Kira just wanted to tear me to pieces? And how you broke my heart in the process? Well, Lacus came to me that afternoon. She told me that you still might've loved me. I don't know why, but for some strange reason, I believed her. That is until your wedding. I just let you go after that."

_I found your picture today_

They began walking together, despite their frustrations. Unknowingly, they were stepping ever so close to his house with each step.

"So, you let me go. Bet you had some fun experimenting with other women, right?" Cagalli retorted, with a hint of slight jealousy.

_I swear I'll change my ways_

"Wrong. I never hugged, kissed, or slept with another woman except you. Even if you married that Kai, you're still the one for me, Cagalli, even if you don't think the same."

_I just called to say I want you to come back home_

Wow. That hit the spot. Loyalty was always a good trait about him, it's just that sometimes he forgot where his loyalties lay. No he made her feel like shit.

_I found your picture today_

Silence lingered as the continued walking closer to an unknown destination.

He stole glances at her hushed figure as they walked, and she still looked beautiful to him, even if what she had done wasn't so beautiful.

_I swear I'll change my ways_

Then out of the blue…

"We need to talk, Athrun. And by talk, I don't mean what you did to me two years ago. I really want to talk this time. Just you and me."

_I just called to say I want you to come back home_

"Because for the past years in my life, I felt empty. I couldn't figure out what, but I kind of had a feeling it was because of you. I don't know what makes you so special to me, but I really want to know what and why. You told me your story…"

She paused as she made out the final destination. It was his apartment building and together they stepped inside his room.

"…now it's my turn to share…"

_I just called to say I love you, come back home

* * *

_

I LOVE THAT SONG TO PIECES! I don't know why, it just hits me deep. Man, I've been itching, itching, ITCHING to write this chapter since ever! MY GOD! It feels good to have it down on paper.

So, what will Cagalli do next? Man, she does manage to snag a little alone time twice each night with two people in this story, huh? First she was raped, then "comforted" by Kai when she snuck into his room. Now, she was "comforted" again by Kai…and well, let's just say, it's not rape no more.

xD! The bonus chapter will be posted on my LJ soon, once I get some inspiration. I thought my last lemon sucked. I really want to make it up with this one, since it is kind of "I want you back" sorta smex. xD

MAN MAN MAN! This is where the AsuCaga fans cheer, cuz the storyline is changing tides and finally rolling for the AsuCaga peeps! CHEER WITH ME!

But first, BE HEARD! SPEAK SOME WURDS! REVIEW!


	14. Behind Blue Eyes

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

I don't own the song "Behind Blue Eyes". It's owned by the musical gods known as The Who and their people.

Aki-note: Well, if you don't bother reading these notes of mine, you'll miss something. If you haven't been checking my LJ, you'd miss a lemon bonus. Yeah, it's posted now. And the italicized words in this chapter are clips, so to speak, from the bonus chapter.

Also, this chapter is Kai centric. Has it been bugging you not knowing who the hell this guy is? Well, I felt that way, so I guess we're even! Anywho, this chapter is all about Kai. Well, on to…the BONUS CUT!

* * *

_They entered without anymore words after that, and once inside, it pretty much stayed that way. She absorbed what little he had in his home. Small and sullied, that's what she called a first impression._

_Pushing aside some cushions, she took a seat on his worn out couch as he sat on a diner style chair across from her._

_She had to admit, she was having a harder time now than she was two years back. She didn't know where to begin and truth be told, she really didn't want to say a thing about well, anything._

"_Athrun, you always had this weird effect on me, ever since that time when we met on that stupid island. God knows why I still care, but even I'm not sure why anymore. I'm married and it's not right for me to…to have these feelings for some other guy."_

_She bit her lip as she hesitated on what to say next. Fiddling around with her thumbs, she avoided straight eye contact with him, not willing to crack under any sort of pressure he gave off for a certain response. He had her falling to pieces._

"_Athrun, what is it about you that makes me want you back? What is it about me that makes you want me back?" _

Athrun leaned on the back of the chair, his chin resting on his arms. "Well, Cagalli, I really don't know either. I just like you. Maybe it was just born to be a mutual feeling."

"_Sounds plausible enough, but why did it have to be between you and me? Why could we just let go and stay that way? Why are you so special to me?"_

"_I honestly have no clue. But from what I can understand….you're not satisfied are you? You're not satisfied with Kai," Athrun said apathetically, somewhat pushing it, his emerald eyes staring into her frustrated golden ones._

"_Satisfied? With Kai? Is all that you see in him and me is that I just use him? For comfort? That I loved him because he was my little toy? Kai is not my play thing, Zala! He's got feelings just like you and me!"_

_He glared now, shifting his position on his chair. "Then why do you love him so much? Why did you stay with him? Why did you marry him? Was it for ORB, again?"_

_Her fingers were literally stabbing, digging in to the cushions. "I married him because I loved him…"_

"_Are you sure about that? Then why are you here? You could've went home, back to him, if you really do love him, Cagalli."_

_Damn that Zala. "I didn't want to be in your debt. I wanted you to know everything, so that I could live a better, clean life without you. I mean, you told me didn't you?" She simply chuckled at the memory of his "explanation". "So there…"_

"_That can't be all. I know it."_

"_Why can't you just leave me alone? Why can't you be satisfied with my reasons?"_

"_Because they're not true."_

_She stared at him, her grip on the pillow tightening, ready to throw it in his face. "Oh really, Athrun. How can you tell they're not true? What makes you so sure I'm lying?" _

"Because you love me."

"_What?"_

"_You love me," he said with a sigh, his eyes drooping as he rested his head on his arms. He was really tired and sure about what he'd done, he was going to bed now. That is until something rudely interrupted him._

_His own pillow betrayed him._

_Picking up his head, his eyes met her burning ones.  
_

"_Don't tell me that I love you. That's my job, you stinkin' bastard."_

"_Well then," he said softly, his head now resting on his hand, "Do you?"_

"_You were right, I guess."_

_Athrun picked his head up in shock. Cupping his own face, he had a priceless look on his face, screaming sarcastically, "Do my ears deceive me? Did you just admit you were wrong?"_

_She smiled. "Oh, shut up and let me finish. I did marry Kai for ORB's sake. But did you ever notice him? I mean take a really good look at him? Every bit of him reminded me of you. Yeah, the appearance was somewhat off…"_

_Raising his left eyebrow, he responded asking, "Somewhat off?"_

"_Ok, ok. Totally off. But still, his personality screamed you. And that's what bugged me. I could have you because I left you and I hate begging for things back, so went out for the next best thing, alright? I stayed with him and married him because I thought you were lying to me these past years. I thought you were still with Mia."_

"_Mia? I told you already, I haven't seen her since the last war!" _

"Yeah, that's what you said, but I never chose to believe it, Zala. I hate believing guys like you. You always make false promises."

_He frowned at the confession on her part. Lying? False promises? But she was wrong on one part. "Cagalli…" _

She looked up to him, her glassy eyes threatening to tear very soon. "What?"

"_There's one promise I have yet to fulfill."  
_

"_Oh really? What might that be?"_

"_When you told me to get out of your house, I promised myself that I wouldn't stop loving you. So, all I need to fulfill this promise is you." He stood from his seat and reached a hand out to her. "Will you let me love you?"_

_Hesitation again. She could only swear that he was rubbing off her, literally. She couldn't do this to Kai, but if what he said was right, she was only using him. That was worse than what she was about to do now.

* * *

_

"_So," he whispered, playing with a strand of her damp blonde hair. "How was that for 'forgive me'?"_

_She lay silent on his beating chest, her head rising with each breath of his._

_And he couldn't help but smile….but at the same time, he had to tell her…_

_And as tired as he was, he didn't want to dwell on those thoughts, especially after such a beautiful connection with her.

* * *

_

**Chapter 14 - Behind Blue Eyes**

_No one knows what it's like_

He woke up to constant ringing and his initial reaction would be to smash whatever it was that produced that irritating noise. But he didn't wish to wake his partner.

He moved his arm beneath the sheets to feel around for her. No such sign. His sagging eyes began to flutter open, hoping to find her.

Nowhere to be seen.

_To be the bad man_

"Must've went out for a jog," he thought silently, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, picking himself up away from the pleasure-soaked mattress.

_To be the sad man_

He pushed away the covers and went for a quick shower, down for breakfast, and went for a head start to his meetings to spend the rest of the day with Cagalli when she got home.

_Behind blue eyes_

Something about this day screamed special. He wasn't quite sure if it was good special, or bad. He just knew it was special.

Walking around Morgenroete, Kai began to examine the new sets of mobile suits, the majority of them being M1 Astrays. Not that these machines still needed to be built, but, in any case, they were.

_No one knows what it's like_

He gazed up at a lone standing M1 and smirked. That was his suit and it's been a while since he had used it. "Six years? Four? Man, it's been a while since I used you, hasn't it?"

_To be hated_

The MS had been out of commission for quite some time. He simply kept it for show and memories of his time in the ORB military, under his wife's control.

_To be fated_

It was because of this one MS, the machines that were thought to only cause destruction, that he met love.

_To only telling lies_

He had met Cagalli with the help of this MS. He remembered it well.

* * *

**FLASHBACK**

_But my dreams_

"Dammit, protect the Archangel!" she commanded, gripping the controls in her grasp.

She was aboard the Kusanagi at the time, with fellow commander, Lednoir Kisaka, her former personal bodyguard.

And she was stuck in a middle of a war, her second one to be exact.

_They aren't as empty_

The Archangel was taking some critical damage and the Kusanagi was the only ship to help it. Strike Freedom was off fighting its own battle, and the other mobile suits on their side were too busy protecting Eternal.

"Shit…" she muttered as she watched the Archangel beginning to fall. "Get one of the Eternal's mobile suits to protect the Archangel!"

"We can't contact them! The signal breaks at every attempt," claimed a soldier on the bridge.

_As my conscience seems to be_

She was starting to panic. Never had a situation such as this ever occurred in battle and she didn't have a plan of action.

She saw the Archangel falling back, getting pursued by enemy ships, and she couldn't do one thing about it.

And in all the confusion and chaos, she was too caught up in her allies to realize an enemy mobile suit stopping them in their tracks.

_I have hours, only lonely_

Her eyes grew wide as it struck her in realization that this was the end for her and her crew. Kusanagi was going down.

The enemy mobile suit pointed its gun straight at the bridge and her heart beat faster and faster.

"Cagalli sama…what should we do?" Kisaka asked, hopelessly staring into the eye of their beholder.

_My love is vengeance_

She sighed, tears welling up in her eyes, and she stared at death head on. "There's nothing we can do, Kisaka…"

She watched as the gun was preparing fire.

"_I'm so sorry, father…"_

_That's never free_

The next thing she expected was an explosion, and she sure as hell got one.

But not on her.

_No one knows what it's like_

She winced as the bright explosion erupted before her, and once the debris flew away, she saw him…

It was an ORB M1 Astray standing before them. It was beat down, left arm missing, right leg completely disintegrated, but still standing as proud as ever.

_To feel these feelings_

She immediately came back to her senses and asked, "Who is the pilot of the MS?"

Kisaka tapped a few buttons on the computer and picked up some data on…

"His name is Kai Takahashi."

She eyed the suit as it began to fly back into battle…but not before he sent a brief message for her.

"I'll protect you…"

_Like I do, and I blame you_

He won her over for sure, all the while not meaning to.

As soon as the battle ended, she asked the commander of the ship that owned his MS to bring him to the Kusanagi.

And, as any loyal soldier, he followed his orders and flew to the legendary battle ship.

_No one bites back as hard on their anger_

He floated from out of the cockpit and found Cagalli, escorted by Kisaka, up on the stairwell.

And when he got a better view of the girl, he never noticed how pretty she looked up close, and he felt a blush crawl up to his cheek. "D-did you wish t-to speak to me, Miss Athha?"

_None of my pain and woe can show through_

At the word "Miss", she wanted to slap him. But she couldn't do that, could she? Instead, she simply frowned. "Don't call me that. It's just Cagalli from here on, do you understand?"

Sheepishly, he nodded. "Yes, ma'am."

_But my dreams_

"Good." She smiled at him; he was so nervous speaking with her it was really comical. The first thing she noticed was his fierce blue eyes and his sleek, ruffled brown hair, his goofy boyish smile, and an extra something she couldn't figure out.

_They aren't as empty_

The next thing she did was unexpected and very unlike a princess. She jumped at him and hugged him, her force of impact pushing them back against the rails. Her face was buried in his chest and her arms were locked around him.

_As my conscience seems to be_

Through his flight suit, he felt wetness touch him. She was crying. Under deep concern, he looked at Kisaka, who in turn was too busy with injured soldiers to care much for now, then he looked back down at the girl in his arms. "Umm…Cagalli?"

_I have hours, only lonely_

She didn't budge, so he just gave up trying to pry her away, even with the odd glances directed towards them. He ran his fingers through her hair, soothing her uneasy figure. "It's alright Cagalli…it's over now…I can protect you…"

**END FLASHBACK

* * *

**

_My love is vengeance, that's never free_

He sighed at the memory. It was nothing but sweet joy since then. He worked hard to move up his ranks in the military until he was the head of it all. He never became a representative; he wasn't related to anyone in the royal families. But he did manage to be good enough to be even allowed to marry the princess, and he was proud of all his hard work to achieve his happiness.

_When my fist clenches, crack it open before I use it and lose my cool_

He glanced at his watch. 3:00.

"Already? Well, Cagalli should be home by now."

_When I smile, tell me some bad news before I laugh and act like a fool_

He jumped into his convertible and rushed through traffic to get home. He was eager to tell her how much he loved her.

_If I swallow anything evil, put your finger down my throat_

He passed by the beach and watched as lovers walk by the shoreline, hand in hand.

_If I shiver, please give me a blanket_

He remembered when he and Cagalli had opportunities such as those. He remembered the first time. But beaches weren't his favorite memories.

_Keep me warm, let me wear your coat_

No, he always favored his M1 Astray. Why?

_No one knows what it's like_

During the aftermath of the war, shortly after that little hug, he went back to work, fixing, modifying, doing whatever to his Astray. She came back to visit him. Well, to actually give him a snack. It was like three in the morning, he didn't blame her.

* * *

**FLASHBACK**

She floated over to the cockpit, sliding her head in for a peak. "Kai?"

His head popped out from under the controls and it startled the girl, bringing her back. He reached out a hand and grabbed her before she had a head on collision with something. "Cagalli, it's late. Shouldn't you be sleeping?"

She frowned immediately. Gee, a lot of things made her mad, huh? That was a lesson he learned the hard way. "Don't you tell me when to go to bed, **soldier**."

He gave her one of his goofy grins. "Well _sorry_."

**END FLASHBACK

* * *

**

_To be the bad man  
_

He remembered. After that, she looked around and so did he. No one in site. He pulled her in the cockpit and well, they just ended up doing it.

Now you get why he kept his Astray?

_To be the sad man_

Sighing, he opened the door to their home and noticed everything was just as he had left it.

He caught Mana, rushing around and about as usual. "Mana, has Cagalli come home yet?"

The plump lady shook her head furiously and shook his hand away. "No, sir."

Kai frowned at excused the lady off.

"Where are you, Cagalli?"

_Behind blue eyes

* * *

_

Where in the world is Carmen San Diego…er…I mean Cagalli? Well, now I hope you can understand more about Kai and Cagalli through that. I just had to include the "Well sorry" line. Much love to Athrun, episode 24 in SEED! Sorry, that scene was rewinding itself in my head.

So, yeah, hope you understand Kai a little better.

Now, I command you all to be heard and REVIEW! lol


	15. I Will Still Love You

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

I don't own the song that makes me wanna ball my eyes out, "I Will Still Love You". It's owned by, hey-look-I'm-a-slut-who-settled-with-her-totally-ugly-back-up-dancer-Kevin, Britney Spears and her people. It's a very pretty song, even if I hate her with a passion.

Aki-note: First, let's get this straight. I DON'T OWN A BRITNEY CD, not that there's anything wrong with that to any fans, but I really don't like her. I went over my friend's house and she obsesses over Britney for all the wrong reasons, but anyway, this song found its way to my heart. I find it very pretty, and well, listen to it, even if you don't like Britney. It's such a pretty duet. God almighty, I never thought I'd stoop down here…But it's really uncanny how some of her songs are actually pretty good…I mean, before she became such a slut.

Well, hope you get a better Kai perspective. I really want to make it hard on Cagalli, as if she hasn't already had it bad in Destiny. But yeah. I mean, she really can't get away with loving two people right? So, punishment! And this chapter will bring back the angst. Sorry, AsuCaga fans. I just had to. On to…

**Chapter 15 – I Will Still Love You

* * *

**

Rays of morning sunshine, shone through his translucent curtains, a small crack opened to bring in the moist feel of the dew outside his window, and the streets empty, lacking the morning traffic and noisy horns and screams of a typical day. The small crevice from the window permitted a much needed morning breeze to enter the humid, love-stenched room. And to his subconscious mind's surprise, he heard an unusual silence fill the room and nothing more but their calm breathing.

_And when the stars, stars are falling_

It was humid enough without her next to him, but what did it matter? They were together…at least in terms of friendship. He knew. He knew that they couldn't be more, at least now that she was married. It was bad enough he slept with a married woman. He had simply committed adultery, same with her, and that was on their permanent record.

_I'll keep calling_

ORB needed those two, whether they agreed to it or not. Well, she did before he had to come along, again. Why couldn't he be satisfied with having peace between her and him? Because in his past situations, he was being swallowed up by complete pessimism without her. He was just too selfish.

_I promise that you'll be my one, my only everything_

He just had to make it hard for her. Her country needed her guidance, her confidence, her charisma. She was ready to marry the man she thought she loved, and she ended up doing so. But he just had to come along, fate and destiny once more playing with their hearts, and making it harder for their already arduous lives.

_I'll never be untrue_

But could he really regret for long? He got everything he wanted; he just needed her to be with him forever…

_And I promise that for all your love I will do anything_

…Albeit she was still married.

_I will give you the stars, I will buy you the moon_

And no matter what, he couldn't change that, turning back time was just something that even a coordinator couldn't wish to do. They were after all human, filled with their own selfish faults.

_Even through the longest of our nights_

He simply couldn't force her to leave Kai. No matter how much it killed him.

_Our love will find a way_

He felt a stir beside him as he lay. She was finally coming to wake.

_And when the stars are falling_

Could he tell her? Could she take it? Couldn't he just be happy with the decision he was about to make now?

_I'll keep calling_

Her blonde head slowly revealed itself as she pulled away the blanket. Her dazed eyes, her primrose fragrance, and her pleasured, languid expression, all revealed in one motion of an arm.

_I will still love you_

And his eyes could not contain themselves to just staring at her lustrous face. Of course, his inner need for complacency just had to be relieved as his eyes wandered to the contour of her silk covered figure, the curvature form she stayed in as she shifted her body closer, the proximity between them driving his already lewd self out of control.

_And when your dreams are fading_

She smiled faintly as she suppressed a yawn to not ruin the moment.

_I'll be waiting_

Damn. Right there. He knew this would be the hardest issue that he had to ever overcome.

_I will still love you_

"Good morning, Athrun," she let out weakly, sliding even closer, if possible, as she felt his arm drape over her waist beneath the covers.

_You were my summer breeze, my winter sun_

Feeling her again. It was torture. She made it oh so difficult, effortlessly.

_My springtime soul, my autumn touch of gold_

He could barely contain himself, his hormones going wild at her innocent touch.

_And you were my sky, my rain, the earth in which my love goes strong_

She could feel is draped arm slide lower and lower until she felt him settle right between her thighs, tantalizing her maliciously. She could feel a pressure build up. Damn, it was way too early for this kind of thing. Exactly why the night time is for lovers.

_The smile of my heart and the breath of my soul_

She could feel his lips brushing off her lips for an early morning wake up call, lightly dancing towards the delicate skin of her jaw line. Her body was turning into a pile of boneless goo again.

_Even if we find ourselves apart_

His nagging conscience was scolding him. He needed to tell her, now. He needed to…to…Oh damn, this was too hard. She loved it, every single bit. He could tell with her moans.

_We will hold our hopes and dreams forever in our hearts_

"Oh yes…" she whispered in his ears as his mouth trailed lower, now resting contentedly at her collarbone, her fingers now fiddling with his blustery hair.

_And when the stars are falling_

He was doing that thing again. Making her feel good.

With her breathing slowly, but steadily picking up its gentle pace, she did manage to let out, "I need a shower…"

_I'll keep calling_

He stopped from his licentious nurturing to give her a bemused look as he floated above her. "Can't it wait?"

_I will still love you_

"Athrun, you should know…"

Sighing in sheer disenchantment, he lay beside her and cuddled up close. "Whatever you say…"

What was with the damn hold up? Why was this so hard? Why couldn't he just tell her?

_And when your dreams are fading_

She smiled a delicate smile and placed a soft kiss on his lips as she made her way to his bathroom.

Oh yeah…because she was so deliciously irresistible.

_I'll be waiting_

He fought the urge to barge in her shower time for a little quickie in the tub, but forced the thoughts away as he changed into some new clothing.

It was time to say something.

_I will still love you_

She quickly stepped out the shower, her dripping wet body just screaming for a warm towel to wrap around her.

He decided to play towel in the warm fluff's place.

_Time may take us apart, that's true_

They made way after a small one to the unusually quiet streets of ORB for a nice breakfast at the closest café.

_But I will always be there for you_

She just made an order for a cappuccino and he simply ordered a baguette. Uncanny. This café was usually bustling round and about with people rushing in and out of work.

But at least this gave them some much needed privacy, even if they dined at an outside table.

_You're in my heart, you'll be in my dreams_

Their orders came in one piece, baguette, cappuccino and all and an overwhelming silence dwelled upon their table.

He was thinking again, she could feel it. And it wasn't good.

_No matter how many miles we've seen_

"What's the matter Athrun?"

He stared blankly at his baguette. "I slept with you…"

_I promise that I won't forget_

"Yeah, so?"

It shocked him. It was like she was never even married.

"Have you completely forgotten you're married?" he asked, completely concerned on whether she had lost her mind or what.

_The day we kissed or the day we met_

"Cagalli…you do realize we can't be together…"

She began to stir her cappuccino nervously. "Of course…"

_The sky may fall and the stars may tilt_

"I really want to be with you Cagalli. But, in this current situation, we can't. You're married and ORB needs this marriage to keep the peace. I'm sure you're aware of that."

She simply nodded, her eyes fixed dead on at him.

_But I will still_

"I know where this is going, Athrun. You needn't go on…I'm really sorry."

_I will still love you_

He couldn't look at her. This was the end. He felt his eyes well up, but he had to be strong for them and their not so bright future separated. But he looked up back into her eyes as he felt her smooth skin caress his cheek.

"Cagalli…"

_And when the stars are falling_

"We may not be able to see each other again, for the sake of the peace, but…"

_I'll keep calling_

Her hand still placed gently on his cheek, she bent carefully forward, placing a warm kiss on his lips.

_I will still love you_

"I do love you."

He pressed his hand against hers, to feel her hand some more. "I love you too."

_And when your dreams are fading_

He felt his cheek growing colder as she took it away and began walking towards the exit. "Goodbye, Athrun."

He had to be strong, he just had to be. But just like everything else, nothing came easy. Goodbye was never something easy.

_I'll be waiting_

He waited until she was out of sight, then he paid the tab and made a run for home.

He just had to get out. Too many bad memories. He was trying to escape before the past would repeat itself once more.

He glanced over at his side table by the couch. That picture.

_I will still love you_

"Goodbye, Cagalli…forever…"

_Time will take us apart, but I will still love you, I promise

* * *

_

YES YES YES! That's over with this chapter! YES YES YES! It's over! It was killing me that I had to write this. And I was undeniably tempted to add a lil fluff in the beginning. WAY TOO TEMPTED!

XD

But that's what happens when you're in love, and I'M IN LOVE! So the whole beginning was dedicated to my boyfriend and well, the little ray of hope I have for AsuCaga.

Please don't kill me. Yes, just in case you're slow, they broke up. Now what will they do? Honestly, I DON'T CARE! CUZ I'M IN LOVE! xD

JK

Chapter Preview – Athrun and Cagalli deal with the large amount of pain they felt, in a short amount of time. Cagalli confronts Kai about a certain love interest she has been having. How will Kai deal with this news? And Athrun, what's he got in mind? He did want to get away from the place.

GOD, I'M IN LOVE! Sorry, but MAN, if I'm still in love when I make those two reunite, you can bet on the best AsuCaga fluff ever!


	16. Never Had A Dream Come True

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

I don't own the song that makes my heart break and think about a special someone, "Never Had a Dream Come True". It's owned by the where-the-hell-did-they-go band, S Club 7. Man, I thank Jesus Christ for iTunes. Yeah, that song is sooo beautiful, you have to listen to it. You have to, if haven't already. It's sooo beautiful.

Aki-note: Well, I just felt super tempted to put fluff in the last chapter, which I did. I hope you liked it! xD Um, let's see. I bet you're itching to know how Cagalli will break it to Kai, huh? Well, you'll have to wait next chapter for that. This chapter is solely based on AsuCaga love guilt, and whatnot. Sorry. Now on to….

**Chapter 16 – Never Had A Dream Come True

* * *

**

_Everybody's got something they had to leave behind_

One after another.

Athrun Zala, tear stained and heart broken, stacked his clothing one after another in his very small suitcase, preparing to depart from ORB once and for all, no intentions whatsoever to come back.

Ever.

_One regret from yesterday that just seems to grow with time_

They fought, argued, made love, settled down, and broke apart. He'd done more than any average person to one girl in a lifetime, and it made him feel low.

_There's no use looking back or wondering_

But there was no point in looking back. All there was, was a future…

_How it could be now or might have been_

…without her.

_Oh this I know but still I can't find ways to let you go_

Was all this really worth looking forward, too? Was leaving really necessary?

Of course.

_I've never had a dream come true_

Looking at her…it would just remind him how much he longed for her touch, her scent, her flavor. It remind him of her baby smooth skin, her well-sculpted figure, her intoxicating sex.

But it was wrong to dwell on thoughts such as these. She was married woman, and she couldn't change that. It was for her country. It was for him.

_Till the day that I found you_

The final thing was his bed sheets. Those damned bed sheet.

And he laughed to himself. "Maybe I should frame these," he said, chuckling afterwards.

He was tempted to do it again. And again, and again, and again. He brought the material up to his nose, taking in her fading scent, memories of their physical intimacy rushing back to him.

But, no. No more.

_Even though I pretend that I've moved on_

He ripped the sheets away from his nose and threw them straight in the garbage.

"It was time for some new ones, anyway," he said, packing the last of his belongings.

_You'll always be my baby_

Closing his bag, the package sealed with a 'click', he moved out of his bedroom towards his living room, where his worn out couch lay…

And that picture.

_I never found the words to say_

Picking up, he looked at it one last time.

And that's when he swore to never love again.

_You're the one I think about each day_

"_I love you."_

Her words rang in his ear, knowing fully it could never be. Not now, not ever.

_And I know no matter where life takes me to_

With a tear in his eye, he placed the picture frame back in place, faced down.

_A part of me will always be with you_

Putting his room keys beside the fallen picture, he opened the door, and halfway through, he whispered, "I will always love you…"

* * *

_Somewhere in my memory_

She ran, hard and fast, her feet slamming against the hard concrete, not caring if anyone was in her way; she just ran.

_I've lost all sense of time_

Until she bumped into someone.

She was the princess after all; she wasn't supposed to be running furiously to begin with. And she couldn't scream curses at the person.

So instead, she stood up, having fallen on her bottom. "I'm sorry.."

And when she saw an inch of pink hair, she knew…

"Lacus?"

_And tomorrow can never be_

The pink haired pop star, with her usual peppy smile, held a package in her hands.

"Cagalli! Oh it's been a while, hasn't it?"

"Uh, yeah."

Lacus frowned. This wasn't Cagalli. There was something wrong, and she knew exactly what. Even the day of her wedding, she knew it was all wrong. The day she met Kai, it all went wrong.

"Cagalli…do we need to talk?"

Cagalli looked up to her friend's concerned, genuine face. How easily that girl saw through her.

"Please…if you're not in a rush."

'_Cause today is all that fills my mind_

Walking further along, passing by hordes of people to a quieter, calmer area.

The beach.

And Cagalli noticed this.

This was where it all began, two years ago.

_There's not use looking back or wondering_

The blonde girl rested her arms on the railing, staring out into the sun.

Something was definitely wrong. Cagalli would usually jump head first into the water, dressed to swim, or dressed to work. It didn't matter. But now…it was different.

Staring out along with her, Lacus simply stated the facts. "It's about Athrun, isn't it, Cagalli. You saw him again, didn't you?"

_How it should be now or might have been_

Cagalli, bewildered, sought her sites on the pop star. "How did you…?"

"Know?" she asked, laughing a little afterwards. "Lucky guess."

"Oh…" And she settled herself back on the railings.

"You slept with him, didn't you?"

Burying her head in her arms, a muffled, 'yes' was understood, but not heard.

_Oh this I know but still I can't find ways to let you go_

"Cagalli, you still love him don't you?"

Cagalli gently picked up her head from her arms to look at her.

She was crying.

"But I can't, Lacus. I'm married! It's bad enough I slept with him two years ago when I was engaged, and I did it again, this time married! It's not fair for Kai, Lacus! It's not!"

The pink haired songstress sighed into the air, her package still held tightly in her arms. "He has to know sooner or later. It's bad enough that you didn't tell him those two years back. I knew everything that happened between you and Athrun, and I felt for all three of you. Kira found out, on his own way of course, and somehow, so did the rest of your friends. Cagalli, it won't kill Kai if you leave him, but it will hurt him more than anything if you don't start telling the truth. How long did you think you could get away with it, Cagalli? How long?"

_I've never had a dream come true_

"I don't know, Lacus! I don't know!" the princess cried in frustration. The truth was scarring her for life. She fell to her knees, her hands covering her face to stop the tears and in a hushed, pained voice, she cried, "I don't know, I don't know, I don't know…"

Lacus fell to her side and rubbed her back. "Cagalli, it's not fair for Kai."

"Don't you think I know that?" Cagalli asked, somewhat screaming at her friend.

And this brought a frown to her face. "Then why haven't you done anything about it. For two years, you kept quiet. Why? Because you knew that you'd never see him again? That things would fall back to normal when you were with Kai? But that didn't happen, did it, Cagalli? You saw him again! And you slept with him, again! When do you plan on telling Kai the truth, Cagalli? He has to know, or for the rest of your life, you'll be living a lie."

_Till the day that I found you_

"Does ORB need another liar for a leader? Cagalli, you should know better than to lie! You shouldn't be so selfish, thinking you could keep them both! It's not fair, right, or honorable! Did your father teach you to be like this? ORB doesn't need a liar for a leader!"

By this time, Cagalli was balling her eyes out. Every word coming from her friend's mouth was the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but. And it pained her to see the light, it really did. Had she been so selfish to think of keeping them both, and living life like normal? Had she ever considered what they felt? She was selfish, self centered, and wrong.

_Even though I pretend that I've moved on_

"Cagalli," Lacus said in a calmer, gentler, more Lacus tone. "It's alright to cry, but you brought this upon yourself, so did Athrun. Trust me, I would've hoped that you told Kai everything two years ago, so all this could be prevented. I believed in you and Athrun. And when you married Kai, I tried to be happy, but the fact that I knew you still loved him and he loved you just bothered me, Cagalli. You have to tell Kai…tell him everything. He has to know. And if not from you, then it will be from me."

_You'll always be my baby_

"Just follow your heart, Cagalli. I wish you the best."

Cagalli looked up to her friend. She was just as she had found her; happy and holding that package.

_I never found the words to say_

Lacus picked up something from inside her package and held it out for Cagalli.

Bewildered, she reached for the envelope.

"Cagalli…I have a feeling you might need this soon." And she left, disappearing into the crowd.

_You're the one I think about each day_

Staring back into the ocean, she thought about her friend's harsh, but truthful words. She felt like the biggest bitch alive. But she really had to tell Kai.

_And I know no matter where life takes me to_

Sighing, she looked at the envelope she held in her hands and decided to let her curiosity get the best of her. Ripping the seal, she pulled out the papers inside and…

_A part of me will always be_

"No way…"

* * *

_You'll always be the dream that fills my head_

He held on to his suitcase as he passed through the corridors of the train station.

_Yes you will, say you will, you know you will_

"All passengers of train 149 to PLANT's shuttle, please form a line in hallway 68!" stated a random voice on the voice speakers.

_Oh baby, you'll always be the one I know I'll never forget_

Waiting in line to be checked, he couldn't help but think of a certain someone when a blonde head stuck out of the crowd.

"Cagalli…"

* * *

_There's no use looking back or wondering_

He hoped into his jet black sports car, growing restless of waiting. Nervousness simply took over.

_Because love is a strange and funny thing_

"Where are you, Cagalli?"

* * *

_No matter how I try and try I just can't say goodbye_

"Passengers of train 149: the technicians are facing some difficulty and your ride will be post-poned until further notice."

Athrun sighed and sank into his chair. Closing his eyes, he only saw her, in all her bare beauty.

* * *

_I've never had a dream come true_

She sighed as she saw a train pass by. "Athrun's probably there already…leaving."

_Till the day that I found you_

She looked at the envelope again and took a deep breath…

_Even though I pretend that I've moved on_

…and screamed into the ocean air.

_You'll always be my baby_

Passing by the beach area, he heard a familiar voice screaming. "Cagalli."

_I never found the words to say_

Parking his car in the nearest space, not caring whether or not there was a handicapped sign in the area, he pulled back his keys and ran in the direction of the voice.

_You're the one I think about each day_

With a passing train blocking his way, he waited impatiently. And finally the train vanished and he saw her.

_And I know no matter where life takes me to_

He ran like it depended on living and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Cagalli, you're…"

_A part of me will always be_

She smiled softly. Kai had found her.

Holding her breath, she held the envelope in a tight grip.

"Where have you been? I missed you," he said lovingly, holding her up close to him.

"Kai…"

He pulled her away and looked into her amber eyes. They were dead serious.

"We need to talk…"

_A part of me will always be with you

* * *

_

FWAHAHAHHAHAHH! BEHOLD THE HATE THAT I'VE HELD IN FOR SO LONG IN MY HEART!

Whoa! That was a handful. I really hated writing this chapter. I'm not good at goodbyes. The next chapter will be the death of me, for sure. The final goodbye is at hand.

So, did Lacus sound bossy and mean enough? I always found her to be a nice mother figure, compared to Cagalli and her naïveté and childish ways. I love Cagalli for acting childish! I LOVE U CAGALLI!. xD

Um, and yeah, that was a lot for Cagalli to soak up in this chapter. As I said before, I wanted her to feel the burn, because it's just not right. So, hopefully that was a 3rd degree there. Um, let's see. A preview of the next chapter!...God, that one's gonna make me cry I can bet on it.

Chapter Preview: Cagalli confronts Kai about her relationship with a certain coordinator. How will Kai deal with the news? And Athrun, will he actually leave ORB and never come back? And what was in that envelope that Lacus gave to Cagalli?

Stay tuned!

And I can assure, I will make the next chapter a tear jerker. I haven't cried in a while, so this oughtta bring out the tears in everyone. Or at least make you sad inside.

BUT FIRST! BE HEARD! REVIEW!


	17. Sweetest Goodbye

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

First off, prepare for a really long author's note.

You should really thank Maroon 5 for being so good, despite the fact that their songs get stuck in your head for hours at a time. Our next heartbreaking song belongs to them and their people and the title is, "Sweetest Goodbye." After rummaging through all my cds, mp3s, and other whatnots, I found them. God almighty, the song was sad enough. But, here's the thing. Every song I hear sings a story. This was the perfect song, cuz all I saw was Cagalli and Kai. Jesus, it made me cry like I was a baby again. I hope you all feel what I felt when you hear the song. You really should get their cd, buy the song, or borrow a friend's cd, cuz the song is really beautiful.

Dragon agility – I knew they were replaced, but eww, their new replacements suck. S Club 7 was the best and original. snort I'm a music geek. xD

JC-Titans 143 – I feel for Kai, too. I got sooo attached to him, it hurts. This chapter, just writing it, will make me wanna cry like crazy.

Well, I'm glad you all liked Lacus' and her mothering tactics. That's how I always portrayed the Virgin Mary (aka Lacus Clyne xD).

And you all want to know what's in that letter huh? Well, one person guessed it right. But I won't say who, but at the end of this chapter, you get a prize, mmk? I think you know who you are.

God, this chapter will be killer, so get your tissues ready…xD. I'll try not to be sooo harsh, and it might not end up sad at all. Hmm, wish us all some luck. On to

**Chapter 17 – Sweetest Goodbye

* * *

**

_Where you are seems to be_

Kai stared into her eyes, full of concern as he noticed the tear stains that marked her cheeks. Today was a special day. He remembered thinking that early morning.

_As far as an eternity _

"What do you want to talk about, Cagalli? Tell me what's wrong," he said in his oh so apprehensive tone, holding her oh so close to him.

_Outstretched arms, open hearts_

God, he was a saint. She couldn't…she wouldn't.

But she had to.

_And if it never ends then when do we start?_

"Kai…" she whispered, pushing him away gently. "I care for you, don't you know that?"

He nodded. Where was this heading?

_I'll never leave you behind_

"But…" she turned away. It was too hard to look him straight in to his naïve eyes, his naïve, lost eyes, filled with genuine compassion that he felt for her.

_Or treat you unkind_

"But I haven't done a great job of caring, Kai. I really didn't."

He looked at her, confused as ever. "Of course you have, Cagalli. What are you saying? You've been a great wife. You've been there for your friends, your family, your country…"

_I know you understand_

"…You've been there for me."

She felt her throat gone unbearably dry, and it was already difficult enough to just tell the truth. She was choking up inside because he really was in love.

_And with a tear in my eye_

"No I haven't Kai," she said, lowly and staring straight at the ground. She was so weak.

He made a tender grab for her arm and forced her to face him. "What?"

_Give me the sweetest goodbye_

Taking in the deepest breath, she had to let it all out. "I haven't been there for you, Kai. The life we were living, our relationship…it was all a lie."

Slowly, he felt his arm growing numb. "What?"

_That I ever did receive_

"Kai, I've kept this from you for two years, and it really hurts for me to just say the truth. And I'm sure you're lost and confused, but after this, I hope we can still be friends."

_Pushing forward and arching back_

His arm finally lost all feeling and slid back to his side as he continued to stare.

_Bring me closer to heart attack_

"Kai, do you remember that boy that you met at the restaurant we ate together at two years ago? The one with blue hair?"

He nodded. "Athrun, was it?"

_Say goodbye and just fly away_

"Yeah, Athrun…we…"

"You what?"

His tone wasn't demanding. His tone wasn't angry. His tone was just Kai.

_When you come back_

"We slept together twice."

And that cracked him, and he felt every fiber of his heart getting shred up by her small, but incredibly strong words. It couldn't be the truth…

_I have some things to say_

"The night we ate at the restaurant, did you notice we both were absent from the table?"

"Yes, but…I always thought you both went to your own homes…"

She bit her lip and struggled to swallow as she felt herself choking up. "We did…or at least I did…"

_How does it feel to know you never have to be alone_

"Then what happened?"

The envelope in her hands was being crumpled this way and that as she struggled to be strong for her and for Kai. "He followed me home, and we ended up sleeping together."

"Didn't it ever occur to you that you could call?" he asked.

He wasn't mad, not the least bit.

And that's what bugged her. His understanding, his authentic concern, his whole character just made it harder to speak the truth. He was so true that when she stood next to him, it felt like he was God and she was the devil. He was just a saint.

_When you get home_

"I tried, but, he stopped me. Kai, it started out as a rape, but I ended up loving it. When I woke up, I told him I never wanted to see him again, but I really did. I missed him. Earlier that day, we kissed at this very beach, beside this very railing. I knew I couldn't let him go. But in my situation, I was engaged to you. And you cared so much, and I didn't want to hurt you, so I just went along with it, hoping that Athrun would never come back to my life. I crawled back to you, on knees and hands, because I was so pathetic."

_There must be some place here that only you and I could go_

She faced up for once and found his expression still the same. Concerned, but all the while emotionless. But she could tell that his blue eyes were losing their fierceness, their cool, their hope. He was having a hard time soaking it in, especially since he had shown nothing but true love for her for six years straight. It was hard.

"And it happened, again, didn't it, Cagalli?" he asked simply, his voice somewhat cracking.

_So I can show you how I…_

"Yeah, just last night. When you woke up in bed alone, I woke up with him on the other side of town. But I didn't mean for it to happen. I went out for a jog, that's it. And I bumped into him. Earlier, he told me why he left me, and I was simply trying to explain back, and…"

"…You ended up sleeping together at his place for the rest of the conversation, right?"

_Dream away everyday _

With a shameful 'yes', she turned away from him, gripping the envelope tighter in her grasp.

_Try so hard to disregard_

"Cagalli…" he held on to her arm, regaining the feeling back. "Why didn't you just say something before? You know you could tell me anything."

"I tried, Kai. But…I was too selfish, too weak."

_The rhythm of the rain that drops_

His grip began to tighten, but still hung on loosely. "That's not all there is to it, right?"

"I loved him, Kai."

"Then why did you stay with me, even after what you two did?"

A tear rolled down her cheek painfully, when she saw his heart burning in his saddened, dulled blue eyes. "Because I didn't want to hurt you. You worked so hard…so hard to be good enough for me. You wanted to marry me, Kai. I didn't want you to feel defeated after all your hard work."

_And coincides with the beating of my heart_

"But Cagalli. This hurt I'm feeling now…is far worse that feeling defeated. Cagalli, I loved you, I worked for you, I wanted you. And I though you did love me back." He grip began to tighten unbearably as his head sank down to her chest to stop the tears.

She felt for him, truly and deeply, running her fingers one last time through his hair. "I thought I did, too. But, all I saw in you was…was him, Kai. I'm r-really s-sorry." She couldn't hold it in anymore. This hurt.

The boy did everything in his power to be with her. He protected her, risking his own life in the process. He treated her right, he really loved her. And what did she do to his love? She crushed it, stomped on it, and spat at it, leaving him in his sorrow.

_I'll never leave you behind_

"Kai, you're a good person," she whispered, cupping his face into her hands, facing him to her. "You're too good of a person to be with me."

_Or treat you unkind_

"But I want to be with you, Cagalli. I always did. When I was soldier, I looked up to you, I saw your beauty, in and out, and I fell in love with you, even if I didn't know you personally. And when you loved me in my Astray…didn't you ever wonder why I kept it? Because I loved you!"

_I know you understand_

"Kai," she bent forward to kiss a tear away on his cheek. "You're too good for me."

"No…no…no…Cagalli…p-please don't g-go…I need you."

_And with a tear in my eye _

"I'm not the one for you, Kai. I hurt you far too much to be good for you. I don't deserve you. I never did, Kai. You gave me your love, and all I did in return was toss it away. Kai, you deserve…b-better."

She looked into his eyes, pained to the core, his tears overflowing, rivulets of tears rolling down his tears.

_Give me the sweetest goodbye_

"I care for you, Kai…but I'm just not good enough."

He cried on her again. "No…please don't go…Please! Y-you're th-the only one f-for me, C-Cagalli! Please, don't g-go!"

She made him like this, and she didn't deserve to be alive for all the pain she caused him and Athrun. She was evil. She deserved no one.

_That I ever did receive_

She tore him away, both still not willing to stop their tears. "Kai, I have in my hand some divorce papers, all ready to go. I signed my part, and all it needs is your signature, and all this can be over."

"But…I don't want it to be over, Cagalli."

"But, Kai…please. You don't need me…Don't make this harder than it already is. Just please sign."

_Pushing forward and arching back_

"You don't understand, Cagalli. People want to marry you for the wrong reasons. For pleasure, as a trophy to show off to their friends, for money, for fame, or for power. I don't want that, Cagalli. I love you for you! Please…I forgive you for everything, but please…don't leave me."

_Bring me closer to heart attack_

"Kai…you'll always have a place in my heart, but if…if you really do care, you'll let me go. Kai…I'm sure you've heard of this one. There's plenty of fish in the sea. You caught me, but I'm not the one, so let me go. There's someone more deserving out there waiting for you, Kai."

_Say goodbye and just fly away_

"Cagalli…"

_When you come back_

"Kai, this pain…it'll all go away when you sign. I care for you, and God knows you care for me. But if we want to be there for each other, we have to do this. We can't go on living a lie, Kai," she said painfully, holding the papers in front of him with shaky, sweaty hands.

_I have some things to say_

He took the paper in his hands, glanced at the text, then looked back at her. "I love you, Cagalli. It was the best six years of my life working side-by-side with you, and even with these new shocking revelations…."

He bent forward for a gentle kiss on her lips, for the last time.

Pulling back slowly, treasuring the moment for a lifetime, he smiled back at her, pained, broken, but nonetheless happy. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

* * *

_How does it feel to know you never have to be alone_

"All passengers for train 149, all ABOARD!"

Athrun woke up from his passionate dreams, unwillingly, at the sound of the announcement. With a heavy sigh, he picked up his suitcase and walked to the line. So this was how it felt for goodbye.

* * *

_When you get home_

"Cagalli…I'll bring these to a lawyer or something. Go get him, back, Cagalli. I'm sure he feels the same way. Don't let him get away this time, tiger," he joked playfully, punching her arm softly with a smile.

_There must be some place here that only you and I could go_

"Kai…thank you so much for understanding. We'll see each other again…"

He laughed good-heartedly. "Yeah, at work! Good luck, Cagalli…"

And she ran away to get him back.

"I'll never forget you, Cagalli...because I love you."

And he turned away back to home. Today was a special day, after all.

_So I can show you how I feel

* * *

_

SOOOOOO! That's over! The hard part is over!

God, was that too draggy? I oughtta read it over. Was it tear jerking? I dunno…I just feel like getting cut deep…really deep. I wonder, was this good enough for a goodbye? I really didn't feel the characters. But I dunno. I guess you might think differently and it might just be me.

And magelie guessed correctly! Inside the envelopes were divorce papers. And you get….A PAT ON THE BACK! LoL

Um….

Chapter Preview – Cagalli rushes around ORB hoping to find a certain coordinator love. But…is she too late?


	18. Iris

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

I don't own the song "Iris". It's owned by the Goo Goo Dolls, and their people. Very, very, very pretty song. I was watching a movie and this song was in the background when the guy who dumped the girl, came back to her and asked her to marry him. A very very cute story. I started to cry at how beautiful the movie was and the song. The song is very very very pretty, and I encourage you to download it. Very nice. It won't disappoint.

And I'm squeeling like crazy right now cuz I've been itching to use this song for like, ever! And now I get to use it! FWAHAHAH!

I realized the last chapter wasn't exactly tear-jerking, I didn't even feel the damn emotion. So well, yeah. Kai going berserk? That would be awesome! Maybe ya'll could convince another author to do that, cuz I'm keeping Kai a saint. LoL.

And before I continue on, please take note of the title of this story. Thank you. It'll help with the final two chapters. Now, on to…

**Chapter 18 – Iris

* * *

**

_And I'd give up forever to touch you_

It wasn't too late. He might've still been at home, lying down in his bed. There was still hope to fix all this.

Yeah, that's what she thought.

'_Cause I know that you feel me somehow_

The seeping feeling of guilt was already ripping her apart inside, but the anxiousness to repair all her wrong was taking over. She felt bad, no wait…terrible. Simply terrible for what she did and kept from Kai. He really was too good for her.

_You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be_

She dashed down downtown, people moving out of her way, or getting a first class visit to the hospital. She wanted to make things right.

_And I don't want to go home right now_

And she needed him to help her do it.

* * *

_And all I can taste is this moment_

He sighed as he waited in line. It was longer than he had ever dreamed of. It was a weekday, nothing special was going on in the PLANTs, and it made him wonder.

It made him wonder if she was running for him.

* * *

_And all I can breathe is your life_

Kira placed his papers aside as he heard the tone of his doorbell echoing through his home. Whom could it have been?

And when he opened the door, Lacus was there to greet their unexpected visitor. Well, for Kira, it was unexpected. "Kai?"

* * *

'_Cause sooner or later it's over_

Dammit. Damn short term memory. She couldn't remember where the fucking hell he lived. It was somewhere downtown, close by a café.

_I just don't want to miss you tonight_

And as if it were meant to be, as a bus drove away, she found the café, and automatically, it jogged her memory of his home.

* * *

_And I don't want the world to see me_

Closer and closer.

As the line began to shrink, he was getting ever so close to the train that would take it all away.

'_Cause I don't think they'd understand_

"You can still leave, Zala. You can still live a life in ORB. She's married, of course. And you can never touch her up close anymore. You can't sleep with her…"

_When everything's made to be broken_

He could barely do anything involving her anymore. If her being Head Representative was bad, then what did that make the marriage factor? If he stayed, he'd stay isolated, and God forbid, the past might repeat itself.

_I just want you to know who I am_

And he wouldn't let her hurt anymore.

* * *

_And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming_

"What are you doing here, Kai?" Kira asked, stepping aside to allow his brother-in-law inside.

_Or the moment of truth in your lies_

As Kai stepped inside, he gave Lacus her envelope. She gave him a knowing look and placed it inside her chest pocket.

"Well, I just came to say it's been great knowing, you guys."

_When everything feels like the movies_

Kira laughed, innocently taking his comment for a joke. "You're kidding, right, Kai? Come on, you can tell us anything!"

And then two twin boys popped up from behind Kira's legs and held onto Kai's. As he pried them off his legs, he patted each of their heads.

_Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive_

"Kira, Lacus…I'm leaving ORB."

* * *

_  
And I don't want the world to see me_

She dashed up the stairwell to his room, and shocked to find his door unlocked. He must've been home. And she was about to step in until she felt a hand gripping her arm. "What the…"

'_Cause I don't think that they'd understand_

"Hey, girl. What are you doing at Zala's?"

"I came to talk to him…Is there a problem with that, sir?" she asked, pushing his arm off, a hint of bitterness in her tone.

_When everything's made to be broken_

When the scruffy old man took a closer look at the girl, noticing she was the head representative, his personality took a 180 degree turn. "Oh, I'm sorry, Miss Representative. I was just wondering where Athrun is."

She blinked. "He's not here?"

_I just want you to know who I am_

"Today is his payment day. He needs to pay the rent, Miss Athha. And well, he's not here…"

Dammit. Sneaky bastard left.

* * *

_And I don't want the world to see me_

"Cagalli and I had agreed to a divorce and I think it would be best if we spent some time apart from now on."

'_Cause I don't think that they'd understand_

"She told you everything, didn't she, Kai?" Kira asked, holding on to his wife's waist.

"Yes, but we both knew it wouldn't work. We're just too stubborn to admit it." It made him laugh to remember how persistent his ex-wife was.

_When everything's made to be broken_

He took a crumpled piece of paper from his coat pocket and handed it to Kira. "That's for Cagalli. Tell her I'm sorry for the crumples." And with that he left the Yamato household.

"Take care, Kai!" Lacus cried, waving to him back as he left.

_I just want you to know who I am_

And Kira's eyes were too fixed on the piece of paper in his hands. Until he felt some tugs on his pants. He looked down to find the twins looking straight back at him with confused looks. "Daddy, where's Kai going? And where's aunty Cagalli?"

_And I don't want the world to see me_

Kira crouched down and patted the boys' heads and tried to ease their confusion with a gentle, fatherly smile. "That's a story for another time."

* * *

'_Cause I don't think that they'd understand_

"Miss…Miss…"

_When everything's made to be broken_

Cagalli was locked in trance as she pondered where Athrun could've gone. But this old man was getting on her last nerves.

_I just want you to know who I am_

"Dammit! Shut up! Here's his damn payment" – She reached inside her pocket and gave him a generous amount. – "No get the hell away from me!"

_I just want you to know who I am_

Her running escapades almost lead her to fall down the stairs and go to the nearest hospital, but she recovered from her slight fall. The train station. Where it all began.

_I just want you to know who I am_

That's where he was.

_I just want you to know who I am_

"Wait for me, Athrun…"

* * *

_I just want you to know who I am_

The nice lady at the front waited for him to hand her the ticket, patiently I might add, as he took his time to scan the area.

She wasn't coming after all.

Sighing, he picked up his suitcase and gave the attendant his ticket.

"Thank you for choosing ORB railways."

And he walked straight to his ride. He wasn't going to miss this train.

_I just want you to know who I am

* * *

_

YAYAYAY! Got that over with! Man, my brain's went on overtime on the summer with this fic! I must say, it's quite sad to know this story is almost over. But I will not disappoint. I just joined this LJ writing community and it's got 30 short story themes for me to do. And of course, it's AsuCaga. That's something to look forward to. And I've got other great ideas in my profile.

Well, Kai's leaving too. tear Sorry, no berserker, but I wonder where he's going. Hmmm.

And will Cagalli reach Athrun in time?

Or will she just miss the train?

Stay tuned to the season finale next chapter! IT'S ALMOST OVER LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!tear


	19. Heaven

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

I don't own the totally beautiful song, "Heaven". It's owned by, originally anyway, Bryan Adams, and now DJ Sammy and their people. I must say, when I heard this song on the radio, I died. And when I heard the song live at a Bryan Adams concert at Hershey Park, I couldn't help but take someone's lighter and wave it in the air. It's such a pretty damn love song. If you heard the DJ mix, I suggest you get the Candlelight mix. It's sooo romantic. xD. This is another download must.

Well, here we are. At the end. I have to thank every single one of my reviewers from the start and the ones that just started. Ya'll have been very, very supportive and I love you all! But not as much as my boyfriend! xD But I want this out before this ends. **I really pray that ya'll won't be mad at me for how this ends…alright?** I hope we can all still be close friends.

Now sit back and relax as Aki-productions bring you…

**Chapter 19 - Heaven

* * *

**

_Baby you're all that I want_

Before he entered the corridor leading him to his fate, he decided to glance over his shoulder. She might've just been held up by the unusually large crowd.

_When you're lying here in my arms_

Yeah. That's all. She really was coming back to him.

_I'm finding it hard to believe_

He felt a tap on his other shoulder. The attendant had a quite stern face on. "Sir, you're holding up the line. If you continue to delay, you will be asked to leave."

_We're in heaven_

No damn sign. I guess this was goodbye.

* * *

_Oh, thinking about our younger years_

She ran as if her life depended on it. And truly, her love life was on the line, leaving on a train to the PLANTs. She couldn't let him get away this time.

_There was only you and me_

She wasn't going to be weak. She wasn't going to let Kai's sacrifice die in vain. All his efforts were not going to go just like that. She wouldn't allow it.

_We were young and wild and free _

"Get out of my way!" she screamed as the once empty streets of ORB regained their bustling on goers, people crowded around, walking here and there getting to their destinations, wherever they may be.

* * *

_Now nothing can take you away from me_

"Well…I never thought I'd use you ever again," one man claimed as he looked up proudly at his M1 Astray, a duffle bag at hand. He smiled. He never would trade this machine for anything…ever.

_We've been down that road before_

He climbed into the cockpit, placed his bag behind his seat, and through his screen, he found his former fellow soldiers standing before him, saluting. What a way to make an exit.

* * *

_But that's over now_

Not caring whether or not she'd arrive at the train station in one piece, she dashed across the streets even as cars passed by, all of them stopping right before they even touched her. Yeah, she used the fact she was an important figure to stop traffic to get to her destination. I mean, come on. You wouldn't want to be responsible for killing the Head Representative, right?

_You keep me coming back for more_

At one moment in time, he was the magnet that was pulled closer to her through attraction. You know, opposites attract? Yeah. Now it was her turn to be pulled in through that same emotion. What a strong emotion is was. Pulling her in without mercy, pulling her persistently through the bustling streets and sidewalks, risking her life as well as endangering the lives of others. But what did it all matter if she wasn't alive with her love?

_Baby you're all that I want_

Life would be downright worthless if that were the case. She was sure that this is how that boy felt when she left him. Alone, cold, miserable. Yeah, she got it down. Unfortunately, there was more at stake than just love. Actually, she'd kept this from almost all her board. But another war was on the verge of rising. People needed to be reminded that peace between Naturals and Coordinators was possible.

_When you're lying here in my arms_

She knew it was a risk, but even Kai thought that this would guarantee a stable relationship with Naturals and Coordinators. A symbol, if you will. Kai had whole heartedly agreed with her decision.

* * *

_I'm finding it hard to believe_

He knew there was more to this than mere infatuation between them. It was hope.

Inside his cockpit, he smiled and with tears in his eyes, he saluted back to his fellow comrades, as he would never see them again. Ever.

"Well, Cagalli…I do hope I'll see you once more. Maybe, once in a blue moon we'll reunite."

He started things up inside, and he flew away.

* * *

_We're in heaven_

She was closer. Just a few blocks away from the beach was the station.

_And love is all that I need_

She was losing her breath, and the burn she felt in her chest was overwhelming and painful.

_And I found it there in your heart_

But she couldn't let that stop her; at least her feet wouldn't, as they tenaciously kept on running beneath her.

_It isn't too hard to see_

There goes that Athha determination again.

* * *

_We're in heaven_

As he took his place by a window seat solo on the train, he placed his bag on the empty seat beside him, and found his wallet had slipped out, some cash rolling along with it.

_Now nothing can change what you mean to me_

He bent over to pick up the wallet, never mind the cash, as a photo came into his view.

_There's a lot that I could say, but just hold me now_

He smiled. A complete replica of his photo he abandoned back at home. The one with him and Cagalli.

'_Cause our love will light the way_

"And I thought I got rid of you…"

* * *

_Baby you're all that I want_

For the benefit of the world, for peace, for hope, for love.

Dammit, she didn't care anymore of the pain she felt. Her chest was throbbing unbearably, and her feet kept aimlessly stomping against the hard concrete.

* * *

_When you're lying here in my arms_

Lacus looked outside her window, a worried expression hidden from her husband as he read on the morning paper.

Without once looking up, he asked, "What's the matter, Lacus?"

"Cagalli…will she make it in time?"

_I'm finding it hard to believe_

And Kira laughed, causing Lacus to pry her eyes away from the scene to her husband. "This isn't a laughing matter, Kira."

_We're in heaven_

"Of course it isn't, but, have a little faith in my younger sister. She can run faster than any damn train out there. She'll catch up."

_And love is all that I need_

Lacus smiled and went back to her station by the window. "I'm telling her you called her younger."

* * *

_And I found it there in your heart_

She dashed through the inner halls of the station, finally making it. She knew the station, heads to tails. Being a traveling politician, it was easy to track down a certain area when you knew where every single bathroom was located. I mean, come on. She knew the place, thick and thin.

_It isn't too hard to see_

"Train149, train 149…" she muttered breathlessly as she pushed away the bundles of people before her, ignoring the nasty comments left. But hey, she did need them.

_We're in heaven_

At last. She had found the area, and by the looks of it, just on time.

That's what she thought.

_Now our dreams are coming true_

Taking no time to catch her much needed breath, she asked the attendant, "Did I make this train in time?"

_Through the good times and the bad_

The attendant frowned and bowed in respect of royalty. "Sorry, Miss, but…the train left 10 minutes ago."

_I'll be standing there by you_

Cagalli choked up. "No…it's a lie! You're lying to me!"

She was making a scene.

"Don't tell me that I'm late! I didn't miss the train!"

_We're in heaven_

The attendant was backing away nervously. "I'm sorry, Representative…but you just missed it. You can check, if it makes you feel better. Just down this corridor," she said timidly, pointing an index forward down a hallway.

_And love is all that I need_

Cagalli needed no second warning. She ran down that hallway like a mad dog, hoping and praying that that lady was not working here.

She finally saw a light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak. She heard sounds of trains.

He was still there! It was all a lie! He was still there to greet her with open arms!

But no…

_And I found it there in your heart_

It wasn't there. The attendant was right. She was too late.

She fell to her knees, her head buried in her hands, as she cried pitifully, defeated. No hope, no reason, no love. It was all gone. All in one day.

She had lost Kai, her perfect ex-spouse, she had lost her lover to a damn train, she missed the train…

She missed her last chance at love and peace. But what did it all matter now? Her tears couldn't bring anything back. It just led to more sorrow…and a life all alone.

She felt a hand on her shoulder, and she took her hands away from her eyes to find…

"ATHRUN!"

She jumped to hug him, tossing him down below her in the process. She held on tightly, not willing to let go, not willing to give up. "I th-thought y-you left!"

_It isn't to hard to see_

He rested his head on the crook of her neck, taking in the fragrance that he couldn't live without. "I couldn't leave, Cagalli, I just couldn't…I love you too much."

And she cried on and on. He wasn't going to stop her.

"By the looks of it…things were settled between you and Kai?"

"Yes…we divorced…and I want to be with you…"

"When I was on that train, Cagalli…I saw a picture, with you and me. I couldn't get over the fact that I was losing. I hate to lose, especially someone I already lost six years ago. I wasn't going to lose you again…"

He pulled her up, and they both stood, not knowing the many eyes watching them from the inside. Camera crews, video shoots, interviewers…all stood in suspense as they were about to catch the moment of a lifetime.

Athrun pulled a small square box from inside his pocket and bent down on one knee.

"Even before that second war, I was thinking long and hard about marrying you. I gave you a promise ring, and even now you're still wearing it. It means a lot, Cagalli. And since we were apart, a little part of me knew we'd come back. A little part of me had hope. And I'm glad I listened to that little part of me. When you went away, it gave me time to buy this" – He opened the little velvet box to reveal a golden ring with the best diamond, the largest she had ever seen, smack dab in the middle – "Cagalli Yula Athha…will you marry me?"

She looked down into his emerald eyes, and she could help but cry. "Yes, Athrun Zala…I would be honored."

He quickly placed the ring on her left fourth, and pulled her in for the greatest kiss of their young lives. They were finally together, and well, the media was there to catch it all.

And as the two no longer star-crossed lovers "made-out" before the cameras, they couldn't help but feel great.

They couldn't help but be glad that they had just missed the train.

_We're in heaven

* * *

_

THERE YA HAVE IT FOLKS! Did I lead you off in my beginning authors note? I wanted ya'll to believe that I was going to make this a terribly horribly lonely ending. Yes, I was going to. I really was. But I can't stand that, not in this story anyway. And I figured, you guys had enough angst to deal with at the beginning, so why not have a happy ending?

Did you like it? Was it too cheesy? What? Come on, be truthful!

Also, before I go, there is an epilogue after this chapter, so we can have an even 20 chapters to this story. Yes, an epilogue. It's not over yet. It's far from. Thanks again for the reviews…BUT I WANT COMMENTS! BE HEARD! SPEAK WORDS! AND REVIEW!


	20. You're Still the One

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gundam Seed, its characters, or its main plotline. I don't own the character Kai. He's happily owned by fellow writer, JC-Titans143.

Hmm, had a really hard time choosing a song for the epilogue. It was a strong fight between "You're Still the One" by Shania Twain or "At the Beginning" a nice duet by Richard Marx and Donna Lewis. But in the end, I just decided that my second choice was just something better to listen to than really fitting into my story. Anywho, "You Still the One" is owned by Shania Twain and her people. Once more, this is another one of my download favorites. The other song is a nice choice, too. Check em both out.

Well, (tear), I think I'm going to cry! I'll miss updating this story, but God, I'll miss this story period! Thank you all for sticking with me, from thick and thin, and as promised, I did make it a happy ending to all the loyal viewers. This is my gift to ya'll. THANK YOU!

**Chapter 20 – You're Still the One

* * *

**

_When I first saw you, I saw love_

'Cagalli,

There's no words to express my love, and there's really no point in expressing it, period, right?

_And the first time you touched me, I felt love _

'By the time you receive this, I've probably already gone. Where? Even I don't know. I'll go wherever my heart leads me, even if it's away from you. I'm not completely positive that I'll move on in love, but even if I do, I'll never ever forget you.

_And after all this time_

'I wish you and Athrun my deepest regards, and I'm very sure you two will show the world what it means to be in love and in peace. You two can finally accomplish that peace your father had been only dreaming of. But you made his dreams come true, Cagalli. You and Athrun. I'm very proud of you, and I wish I were there to congratulate, but you and I agreed that we were separated and would stay together in the means of friendship.

_You're still the one I love_

'And no matter where life takes me to, I'll always be thinking of you.

Love,

Kai'

_Looks like we made it_

Cagalli smiled down at the crumpled piece of paper and placed it on her nightstand. She'd always feel for the boy, even if it's been a while since their last appropriate conversation. She never did see him again, and even though they were separated once and for all, she did aspire for them to become friends. But that aspiration would never come true, as he would never come back.

It's been another four years, and now, she and her hubby were officially at the ripe age of 28, with two four year olds running around the Zala Estate. Yes, the Zala Estate.

_Look how far we've come my baby_

After the media caught site of the Princess 'making out' with Athrun Zala after his engagement outside ORB Railways, word obviously spread, faster than wildfire, that Athrun Zala, ZAFT's finest and the son of then Chairman, Patrick Zala, and Cagalli Yula Athha, the current Head Representative of ORB, were officially a match.

_We mighta' took the long way_

But don't think this match made in heaven hadn't any faults and problems. The bonding of a Natural and a Coordinator did erupt some controversy among the worlds, but it was simply nothing those two could handle, together.

It was together that they proved to the whole world that peace could be truly achieved between the two races, despite their differences and flaws. They were all simply human, which they both made clear.

_We knew we'd get there someday_

It took some getting used to, but people, Coordinators and Naturals alike, finally opened up to the idea of real peace. The threat of war had died out, and idealism had finally begun to bloom in both worlds.

And it was all because of a persistent love interest.

_They said, "I bet they'll never make it"_

Athrun Zala had shortly accepted the position of Supreme Chairman of the PLANTs, right after his public engagement with Cagalli. Until now, the spunky young blonde had still continued to rule over her nation, and finally got the hang of it.

_But just look at us holding on_

And because Miss Athha was unbearably fertile, soon after the honeymoon, out popped two little girls. Completely eye boggling how they resembled their mother and father. One with blonde hair, green eyes. The other, blue hair, golden eyes.

_We're still together, still going strong_

Also due to their positions in power, the mere thought of being separated was unthinkable. Simply out of the question. And since they paycheck was more than enough, they decided to keep a house on ORB, as well as the PLANTs, that way, no hassle and no separation.

_You're still the one_

And as if ruling nations wasn't time consuming enough, their little daughters were growing up, and well, mom and dad needed to be their for them. A nice quick vacation if you will.

_You're still the one I run to_

And let's not forget out dear friends, the Yamatos, the Elthmans, and the Jules.

Lacus ended up telling Cagalli of Kira's sarcastic remark of her being the younger one, and even if she was filled with utter joy, she still managed to give that boy a knock in the head he wouldn't forget. And, in addition to their two little boys, their little girl had finally entered the world.

_The one that I belong to_

Yzak and Shiho, still going strong despite their stupid little quarrels, now worked with the Council in the PLANTs, and were expecting their first little one this coming August.

And our Dearka and Miriallia had their set of twins, a girl and a boy, and it seemed to be that, for now anyway.

_You're still the one I want for life_

And life was good again.

_You're still the one_

And today happened to be a special day. Now, what day you ask?

_You're still the one that I love_

Why, the wedding anniversary of the grand rulers of PLANT and ORB. Grand, isn't it?

_The only one I dream of_

"Cagalli, dear. I have a surprise for you!" Athrun hollered from the base of the grand staircase of her mansion on ORB.

_You're still the one I kiss goodnight_

"Does this surprise involved any whipped cream or wine?" she asked teasingly as she came down the stairway in, brace yourselves now, a dress. After all, could she deny her husband for wanting her to dress up?

_Ain't nothing better_

"No, dear. Something much better!" he yelled, encircling his arms around her waist, holding her up high, twirling around the gargantuan foyer of their home.

_We beat the odds together_

With simple little giggles escaping her as his tickling fingers continued on, she asked, "Then what?"

Placing her down beside him, he placed a soft kiss on her forehead. "Well, for starters, the kids are out of the house, and our lives, for today at least."

_I'm glad we didn't listen_

"Where are they?" Cagalli asked, a tad bit concerned with her vanished children.

"They're bonding with uncle Yzak! Besides, he does need some fathering experience or he'll tear his kid apart!"

"Did it ever occur to you that he might tear our kids apart?" she asked, her pissy mood coming back, as Athrun led her out the door. That's the good old Cagalli we all came to know and love.

_Look at what we would be missing_

"Of course Yzak wouldn't do that! He knows better! Besides, he's really good with kids, shockingly," Athrun said with a chuckle as he led her inside his car. Destination? She didn't know for sure.

_They said, "I bet they'll never make it"_

She hated not being in on something, just like the good old days, but trying to act like the mature woman she was supposed to be, she kept her mouth shut for the ride.

Passing by some passenger jets, she began to grow somewhat suspicious.

_But just look at us holding on _

Parking the car, Athrun escorted his lady to a nearby jet plane, seating themselves on the custom leather seats, facing one another.

_We're still together, still going strong_

"Athrun…explain," she said, folding her arms across her chest.

_You're still the one_

"Have you forgotten what today is?"

She blinked. "What's today?"

_You're still the one that I love_

His hand clutched his clothes near his heart, looking injured. "Ouch, Cagalli, that hurts. You don't know today?"

She shook her head.

_The only one I dream of_

"It's our wedding anniversary! You've been cooped up longer in that office than I have!" Athrun joked playfully, taking a drink from his glass of champagne before them.

"Oh shut up," she muttered, gulping down her drink in one swallow.

_You're still the one I kiss goodnight_

"Now, now," he said, shaking his index negatively, "Is that any way for you to speak to your husband on out wedding anniversary?"

"You're my husband, Zala. I can treat you however I want," she said, placing her glass down with a grin.

Athrun smiled back before looking out the window. "Hey, we're here."

_You're still the one_

Before she was allowed to even take a peek outside her window, he lifted her bridal style from her seat and out the door. "What the hell, ZALA?" she screamed non stop, kicking, screaming, punching, all to get away from his damn coordinator grasp.

_You're still the one I run to_

He finally let her down, on her two feet, and examined the area. "Do you remember this place, Cagalli?"

She grunted, giving him an innocent slap on his arm before scanning the unknown area. "Should I remember?"

_The one that I belong to_

He looked at her, teasing, "Are you sure you're 28? You've got the memory of an eighty year old!"

That earned him a harder smack on his arm. "Screw you…Where are we anyway?"

_You're still the one I want for life_

"Where it all began…before all the hurt we put on each other, before all the passion, before our marriage, and before our children…we're back to the beginning," he whispered, taking his eyes nowhere off hers.

_You're still the one_

"Cagalli…I know this is kind of cheesy, but I have some sweet nothings to tell you, just like when we were 16 again.

"The reason why I wanted to live through the wars we've been through. The reason why I want to wake up every morning. The reason behind my desperation. The reason behind my wrongs. The reason behind my rights. The reason why I love….that reason is you.

"I've done a lot of pretty crappy things to you, married or not. I have my faults, you have yours, but I'm glad we did what we did. I stand before you in this deserted island, in front of this glowing sunset, with no regrets whatsoever, except giving you an appropriate anniversary gift."

_You're still the one that I love_

He took her hand and rushed her to follow him to the other side of the island where a little hut was found. "This wasn't here when we first arrived."

"Of course not. I asked some people to build this for you and me ahead of time, and so by the time of our anniversary, we could use it," he whispered naughtily into her ear.

_The only one I dream of_

"I've got a couple of words to say, too. Athrun, for starters, you're an idiot. You scared me half to death when I found no kids screaming in our house. You made me hurt when you left me after we had just done it four years back. You made me cry when I thought you left on that damn train. And finally," she kissed his lips softly, "you made me realize what it really is like to be in love, true love. I guess even morons like you can do something right after all."

_You're still the one I kiss goodnight_

After several kisses, and nice candlelight dinner in their little hut…well, I think you can think up the rest.

_I'm so glad we made it_

And as rich moonlight entered through a single window above their heads, both stuck in each other's warm embrace, he whispered into her ear, "I'm glad I was the persistent bastard who married you," nipping softly at her ear.

"And I think I'm the luckiest girl in the world to be loved by an obsessive bastard like you," she retorted sarcastically.

"You know…it's still early, no kids around, still have some energy for…"

"Another round?" she finished for him, picking herself up to gaze down at his emerald eyes.

"You guessed it."

"It is our anniversary…"

"You know…when we first met on this island, I knew that I'd grow an obsession over you. You know why?"

As he went lower, she gasped, "Why?"

"Because I never did take that chance…what we're doing now…"

"You were thinking about doing this? When we barely knew each other?"

"Hormones…it's all about those teenaged hormones."

"But it doesn't end there does it, Athrun?"

"Nope," he whispered as his tongue swirled around her belly button. "Because we may be growing another year older as a couple, but I'm glad we're together at where it all began."

She ran her fingers through his hair and lifted him back up towards her. "Be gentle. There's a third one in there.

"And Athrun…Three kids and four years later, we're only beginning…"

He smiled at her remark, and taking the advantage of a kid-free, work-off night, he took his liberties and with her, loved the night away.

It was just the beginning…

_Look how far we've come my baby

* * *

_

Did I over due the fluff? There was really no point in writing this chapter, but think of it as a gift to all who stayed true to this story. Once more, I thank everyone who read and reviewed faithfully and I hoped you enjoyed the AsuCaga fluff! LOL

One last time, folks, BE HEARD, SPEAK WORDS, AND REVIEW!

(tear) I can't believe it's over….I LOVE YOU ALL! xD


End file.
